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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learninh and taking responsibilities. What are your opinions on this?

#countries #children #work #people #learninh #responsibilities
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People are divided on whether
children
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 should earn some form of payment for doing some
work
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. Some find
this
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 unacceptable, while it's seen by others as an avenue to gain essential
work
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 experience for learning and taking responsibilities. In my opinion, there are benefits associated with paid
work
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 that make
this
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 right,
in addition
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 to the valuable
work
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 experience. Why I believe that paying
children
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 some
money
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 for the services they render is a good thing is that it helps them to value
money
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.
In other words
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, when they have to
work
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 for hours to earn an income, they tend to appreciate
money
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 and are less wasteful with their spending.
For instance
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, a kid might decide to spend 10 dollars he received from his father as a gift on a toy but choose to save the
money
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 he earned from babysitting for a neighbour.
Furthermore
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, paid
work
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 for youngster help them to behave responsibly. Because of the reward in form of
money
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,
for example
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, they learn to endure hardships and distractions they may be faced with that might affect their productivity. To illustrate, as a child who suffered from Attention deficit disorder, my parents were surprised that I did well as a part-time paid receptionist in a nearby
children
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's clinic in comparison to when I was just an unpaid volunteer. In conclusion, I strongly believe
children
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's engagement in receiving payment for their services is right because it teaches them how to be financially smart, take more responsibility and focus more than they would ordinarily
Submitted by oyeludevictor on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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