Many young people today leave school with a negative attitude towards learning. Why？What can be done to encourage a positive attitude to learning in young people？

It is generally acknowledged that a significant number of pupils give up studying at their school with a negative

tendancy

Correct your spelling

tendency

regarding studying. There are certain reasons why they behave

such

Linking Words

a trend

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and suggest possible ways to handle

this

Linking Words

situation. On the one hand, some

students

Use synonyms

tend to think negatively

towards

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about

show examples

learning because

although

Linking Words

they study hard, it is hard to get a job in

this

Linking Words

overcrowding society. Not only does the increment of

population

Add an article

the population

show examples

cause the decline of job opportunities, but it may

also

Linking Words

contribute to intensive competition

amoung

Correct your spelling

among

students

Use synonyms

Correct your spelling

thereby

show examples

there by

Correct your spelling

thereby

show examples

leading to

further

Linking Words

more qualifications.

For example

Linking Words

, a survey conducted by the Korea Labour Foundation has revealed that almost 30%

Use synonyms

students

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of students

show examples

in Korea say that

education

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which is provided by

school

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the school

a school

show examples

inevidable

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inevitable

as an

unempolyment

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unemployment

employment

issue

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is the same

issue

Use synonyms

regardless of the level of

education

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Moreover

Linking Words

, some adolescents suffer from poverty, and

therefore

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they believe working and supporting their

family

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families

show examples

is more crucial than studying at

Use synonyms

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

. Due to the development of technology, a life span has been extended.

As a result

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, there is an excessive burden on young people to support seniors.

However

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, it is not all doom and gloom as there are

sollutions

Correct your spelling

solutions

to tackle

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

issues.

Firstly

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schools

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should provide academic subjects along with practical skills. Having relevant experiences or having acquired useful

softskills

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soft skills

that can be

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apply

show examples

valuable to a company can put one ahead of the game when applying for a job.

Therefore

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, learning various skills play a key factor in preventing

students

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from leaving

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schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

Secondly

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, governments should allocate state funds to provide free

education

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to poor

students

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. while governments have obligation to support basic needs, citizens have

Correct article usage

the

show examples

rights

Fix the agreement mistake

right

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to enjoy

education

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Therefore

Linking Words

, it is reasonable to point out that providing

Correct your spelling

free

show examples

fee

Correct your spelling

free

show examples

education

Use synonyms

helps

students

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suffer from financial

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

. In conclusion, owing to the

issue

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of jobless and financial

problem

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problems

show examples

, a lot of

students

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leave

schools

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with a

skeptical

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sceptical

show examples

attitude towards studying.

However

Linking Words

, there is no doubt to point out that providing practical

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

and financial support can be an efficient means of solving

this

Linking Words

issue

Use synonyms

hiasince38

Apr 14, 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

348 words

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Many young people today leave school with a negative attitude towards learning. Why？What can be done to encourage a positive attitude to learning in young people？

Fully explain your ideas

- Both government and individual are spending vast amount of money protecting animals and their habitats. This money could be better spent dealing with fundamental issues in society such as poverty and healthcare. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In some countries, there are more young people enrolled in work based training instead of attending university. Do the advantage of the situation outweigh the disadvantages.