More and more young people from wealthy countries are spending a short time in communities in poorer countries doing unpaid work such as teaching or building houses. Why? Who benefit from this, the community or these young people?

In
this
present-day world, it has to be said that a great many younger
people
from the affluent
communities
are helping the poorer
communities
by doing unpaid jobs: teaching and building houses.From
this
action,both youngsters and poorer society benefited;younger
people
get
tax
benefits
from
this
charity work ,and underdeveloped countries get an education and free shelter.
Apart from
this
, both groups get
happiness
and satisfaction.
This
essay will enunciate
this
theme in detail with appropriate examples. To commence with, it is indeed an irrefutable fact that younger
people
from rich countries know about the global crisis and they acquire knowledge about the importance of helping others.
Firstly
, youngsters can feel internal
peace
and
happiness
while
doing charitable work.
Secondly
, younger
people
can get
tax
exemption and generosity.
Thirdly
, they can improve their
life
values.To cite an example, a survey was conducted by Harward University about what are the main reasons for helping poorer nations by the younger generations from wealthy nations.The result shows about 75% of
tax
benefits
,80% mental
peace
and
happiness
, and
finally
, 90% improved
life
values. To continue, it is paramount to consider poverty-stricken
communities
'
benefits
from
this
charity work.
Firstly
, they get
happiness
and
peace
.
Secondly
, they get an education and
this
can help them to get a job.
For instance
, a study was conducted by the UNESCO organization about charity receivers'
benefits
.The result shows about 90% of them get
blissful
Correct article usage
a blissful
show examples
life
from education and shelter.In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
light of
this
relevance, UNESCO has started to provide more amenities and funds to impoverished
people
. In conclusion, it is crystal clear that both younger
people
from affluent nations and poorer
communities
get
happiness
, mental
peace
,and
blissful
Correct article usage
a blissful
show examples
life
.
Apart from
this
, youngsters from wealthy countries get
tax
benefits
Rephrase
apply
show examples
also
.
Submitted by mariyatresavarghese on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but the logical structure needs improvement. The main points are somewhat supported, but the essay lacks depth and development.
task achievement
The response is complete, but the ideas need to be more comprehensive and the examples more relevant. The essay addresses the task, but the depth of discussion is limited.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: