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Band 7.5

Young people who commit crimes should be punished in the same way as adults. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #crimes #adults
In the meantime, it has been evident that the number of crime cases attempted by teenagers has grown on a large scale. Since there is a vast growth, the topic of argument is, whether these people should be taught a lesson and treated leniently or they should be redirected to alter their behavioural issues. In
this
 essay, I will discuss my notes on
this
 concern and provide my extent of agreement.
First
 of all, I believe punishing young people for committing crimes can create consequences impacting negatively their lives
instead
 of bringing improvement in their behaviour.
For example
- In the year 2016, an adolescent committed the crime of theft in a bank. After locking him in prison, the child got depressed and tried to finish his life because he thought he did not have any
further
 life. 
Moreover
, there is a big experience difference between an adult and a younger culprit.
Hence
, there is a possibility that crimes made by juveniles can be out of innocence.
Secondly
, The teenagers contain a great scope for improvement and they deserve an opportunity to prove themselves.So, I believe that rather than dealing roughly they need to be sent through rehabilitation to help them to become a better member of civilization. To sum up, I do not agree with the statement that minors and adults should be on the same page if they have been misdirected in their life.
However
, the youngsters are considered the future of a country.
Hence
, I believe that they need a helping and gentle hand to lead them in the right direction.
Submitted by sandeep.sarba on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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