IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#tourism #source #revenue #countries
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In a set of
countries
Use synonyms
,
tourism
Use synonyms
 has become an income-producing service, but its drawbacks should
also
Linking Words
 be taken into consideration.
However
Linking Words
, the benefits surpass the disadvantages. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea to some extent, and in the upcoming paragraphs, I will express my take on
this
Linking Words
.
Tourism
Use synonyms
 is a high revenue-producing service almost globally.
This
Linking Words
 is all because of globalization. On the one hand, in
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
countries
Add a comma
,countries
show examples
 the government takes
this
Linking Words
 into account and tries to work out plans to attract as many visitors and vloggers as possible especially
on
Change preposition
during
show examples
 vacation season using different tools
such
Linking Words
 as types of marketing ones especially influence marketing and social media marketing.
This
Linking Words
 results in an increase in
employment
Add an article
the employment
show examples
 rate. And a lot of jobs become vital during that period.
For instance
Linking Words
 the work of guides and drivers which become very active. But when it comes to economical problems, here we encounter a huge problem. Tourists are sometimes inattentive and fill the
Use synonyms
countries
Fix the agreement mistake
country
show examples
 with garbage and trash.
This
Linking Words
 can lead to
tremendous
Add an article
a tremendous
the tremendous
show examples
 amount of economical problems
such
Linking Words
 as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
deforestation and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air pollution.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the government can raise awareness among locals which in their turn can pass to the citizens of other
countries
Use synonyms
. To sum up, it can be noticed that the advantages outrace the drawbacks.
Consequently
Linking Words
, it is a good option to make
tourism
Use synonyms
 a vital source for
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
. And the government should take as many steps as possible to allure the tourists and try to reduce the
environmetal
Correct your spelling
environmental
 issues caused by
tourism
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Sofia-Haykuhi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: