Some people think that students who achieve the best academic results should be rewarded. other believe it is more important to reward student who show improvement. discuss both opinion and views.

There is a war of words regarding the issue of rewarding
pupils
in schools. A Bunch of personages claim that
students
should be prized by the institution on the basis of academic performance;
however
, others think in a reverse manner and argue that
students
who depict developments should be rewarded is more essential. In
this
disquisition, I will explicate both stances before presenting my consensus on the latter view. The underlying reasons why institutes should reward
pupils
based on their intellectual achievements are two-fold. Perhaps the main reason why people are in favour of
this
idea is that
this
might act as a confidence booster for the
students
. If the
students
got the reward based on their academic performance, it would be limited between a certain group of
pupils
because everyone is not equally academically capable. Learners who are not academically outstanding in terms of class results will still be rewarded and
also
be motivated to work hard in order to improve themselves.
Besides
that, it
also
motivates them to do their task with determination and dedication.
Although
students
might not have a good academic result, they can still achieve the prize by showing overall betterment,
for instance
, in sports or co-curricular activities.
This
may lead to more intelligent future generations. Despite the above argument, why do many people feel that rewards should be given to
students
who are academically outstanding? The main reason behind
this
is that there will be more competition between them in order to attain
first
place in class.
Although
students
will be much more sincere in their education, they might be more stressed, which may affect their health, resulting in fatigue and bad behaviour. Various studies conducted in the USA concluded that
students
in primary school are more stressed because of their cold race to achieve the highest position in the school. In conclusion, despite that
students
might be encouraged to study more in order to be the
first
guy in the class, it is much more fruitful to reward
pupils
who are trying to improve themselves not only educationally but
also
in other aspects.
However
,
students
should not be rewarded in a limited number based on their positions, rather than they should be given gifts to encourage themselves
Submitted by md2020 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: