Some people believe that main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers instead of to benefit them individuallv. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #purpose #schools #children #citizens #workers #benefit #individuallv

Controversies surrounding

what

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

the purpose of going to

school

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

never seem to cease. Many individuals opine that the main significance of sending kids to

school

is to make them

became

Wrong verb form

become

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

great

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

, whereas others assert that it is to make one’s personal improvement. I fundamentally concur that the purpose of going to

school

is to benefit the kids themselves, not for making them a fine

worker

Fix the agreement mistake

workers

show examples

. On the one hand, those who believe that having an education at

school

can stimulate their work abilities. To be more specific, people can work with their

team-mates

Correct your spelling

teammates

show examples

school

and learn how to get along with a group of people. If you study alone at home, you won’t have a chance to do so.

Furthermore

, you can continually grasp your opportunities to ask the

school

teachers questions, they would be happy to answer you.

On the other hand

, the goal of having an education at

school

isn’t that simple. It is about fulfilling your own dream, not just

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

blending into society. To illustrate, if you want to become a doctor, you will have to study in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

medical

school

for 7seven years.

Moreover

, you won’t even remember the detail of your life in

school

, yet can recall vividly what

those

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

most valuable things you learn at

school

are. To conclude, even though there are individuals submitting that going to educated institutions is to try to fit into the society and become a citizen with

Remove the article

apply

show examples

better

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

,I still consent that there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

more meaningful

aim

Fix the agreement mistake

aims

show examples

in doing so.

Submitted by rruby6120tw on Tue Apr 26 2022

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers instead of to benefit them individuallv. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You and some friends ate a meal at a restaurant to celebrate a special occasion, and you were very pleased with the food and service. •give details of your visit to the restaurant. •explain the reason for the celebration. •say what was good about the food and the service.

Many people nowadays prefer online shopping. Is it a positive or negative development

Today level of stress at the work place are increasing tremendously. What are the causes? what can the problem create?

some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

in the past, people wore their traditional clothes and followed their cultures. these days, most people wear similar clothes and therefore look very similar to one another. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?