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Band 2.5

The best way to improve health is to exercise daily. To what extent do you agree?

#health #exercise
Nowadays, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
 consider that daily
exercise
 is crucial for
human's
Correct article usage
a human's
show examples
 healthy and happy
life
. I totally
argee
Correct your spelling
agree
 with those
people
. Because, recently years most of
people
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the people
show examples
 are having
a
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an
show examples
 overweight related to their modern
life styles
Correct your spelling
lifestyles
show examples
such
 as
,
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apply
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 fast food and shortage of physical movement. The overweight is one of the
biigest
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biggest
 causes of any
diseases
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disease
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.
Therefore
, daily
exercise
Add a missing verb
is proven
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proven
Add the auxiliary verb
proved
has proven
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that
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
 way to prevent any diseases according to the studies and research. As well as, daily
exercise
 is important for not only
physical
Correct article usage
the physical
show examples
 development of
people
, it
also
 so significant for the mind and spirituality
of
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apply
show examples
the
people
. Due to
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
show examples
 research,
people
 who are doing daily
exercise
 constantly have a low risk to get stress and sickness than
people
 who don't do any
exercise
.
In addition
, daily
exercise
 can increase the capabilities of
human
Add an article
the human
show examples
 mind and provide the stabilities of human spirituality.
As a result
,
Finally
, daily
exercise
play
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plays
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main
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the main
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 role to improve
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
show examples
 of
people
's
life
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 during
this
 stressful
life
.
Submitted by e_ingad on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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