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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Governments spend a lot of money on public celebrations such as national holidays and public festivals. Some people say that the government spends too much on this and that they should use this money on other useful things. Do you agree or disagree

#governments #money #celebrations #holidays #festivals #people #government
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It is often believed by many people that authorities use much amount of
money
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 on the celebrating national holidays and festivals whereas others opine that wherewithal ought to invest in the other necessary development
such
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 as economical growth and public
health
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. I completely agree with
this
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 notion. My position is justified
further
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 with reasons and examples. To commence, the foremost argument to justify my stand is it helps to improve the economy of the
nation
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. To elaborate on
this
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, more
money
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 needs to be
investe
Correct your spelling
invested
 in the educational sectors; government should provide free higher education to the poor students, who are unable to afford the fees. If the people are well educated
then
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 they are likely to get better employment in future.
As a result
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, they can earn
money
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 by themselves;
financial
Correct article usage
the financial
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 burden of the central authorities will
significantly
Add a missing verb
be significantly
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 reduced, which can contribute
into
Change preposition
to
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stable
Add an article
the stable
a stable
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 economy of the
nation
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. For an instance,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 developed
nation
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, governing bodies reserved their
money
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 to develop the standard educational system across the country which made individuals capable enough to find a suitable job after graduation ergo, the unemployment rate is extremely low; the public
contribute
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contributes
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 to the economic growth of the
nation
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.
Moreover
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,
money
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 needs to spend on public
health
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 in lieu of
celebration
Correct article usage
the celebration
show examples
 of the festivals.
This
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 is because owing to the poor
health
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 care system many people are not able to get appropriate treatment. It is true that many diseases are spread by the poor hygiene of the hospitals.
Therefore
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,
health
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 care departments need to use their funds for building more efficient hospitals with modern technology equipment.
This
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 will reduce the mortality rate among humans in society as the standard medical treatment should be given to the patients.
For example
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, India, a developing country, established more community hospitals in each city in the
nation
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 to combat life-threatening diseases. In conclusion, notwithstanding investing in the celebration of the festivals other imperative parts sectors
such
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 as education and healthcare can not be overlooked.
Submitted by dipendharmani786 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • allocate funds
  • cultural heritage
  • national pride
  • balanced approach
  • stimulate local economies
  • social cohesion
  • fostering social harmony
  • opportunity costs
  • address crucial issues
  • effective governance
  • public funds
  • overall societal benefit
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