IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say causes and what effect this has on the individual and society in general.

#people #time #hobbies #effect #society
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In today´s world, it is becoming more frequent to do fewer
activities
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 during our spare time.
This
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 essay will explore the causes of
this
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 situation and illustrate the damage it can produce in the long term. There are several factors that can contribute to individuals having fewer hobbies.
To begin
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 with, current employees have a heavy workload, which together with commuting, leaves them with no additional time.
For example
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, if a worker lives two
hours
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 away from their job, there is virtually no time left in the day for other
activities
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.
Additionally
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, thanks to the advancement of technology, almost everyone has access to a cellphone and a social media account. Because of the way these applications were designed, users spend
hours
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 on them without even noticing, which consumes most of their leisure
hours
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.
For instance
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, young adults can spend on average 150 minutes a day on Instagram. If not properly addressed
this
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 could have negative consequences for both citizens and nations. On a personal level, the lack of
activities
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 to relax and disconnect from the daily concerns could result in more stress
,
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apply
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 and eventually could result in a poor performance at work.
Such
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 is the case of employees who work non-stop, and are unable to finish their tasks within the schedule. On a community level, it could lead to a decrease in overall happiness.
In other words
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, countries with better life-work balance tend to be more content and have a longer life expectancy. To conclude, due to working long
hours
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 or scrolling on their phones people decide not to engage in recreational
activities
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. If not solved,
this
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 could lead to workers underperforming and countries with depressed residents.
Submitted by romikoif on

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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