IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Universities should allocate the same amount of money to student's sports activities as they allocate to their libraries. Do you agree?

#universities #amount #money #student #sports #activities #libraries
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Sports
Use synonyms
 play a very integral and vital role in human lives
this
Linking Words
 day as people are becoming more
health conscious
Add a hyphen
health-conscious
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 and fitness freaks.It is argued that the educational institutions must equally spend the money on physical exercises as they do for libraries.I do agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement to some extent and the following essay will discuss the reasons behind
this
Linking Words
. To commence with, organizing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
 events can encourage students to indulge themselves in physical activities along with their academic courses.For an instance, In
India
Add a comma
,India
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 90% of the parents deprive their children of playing
sports
Use synonyms
 because they want them to do better in their studies.They think that
sports
Use synonyms
 are just a wastage of time and their kid's
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
 can be ruined if they are into
such
Linking Words
 activities. So, if the schools take the
inititative
Correct your spelling
initiative
 in arranging
such
Linking Words
 things
then
Linking Words
 parents will not be able to question the school and it will give students the chance to choose the sport of their own choice.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, spending too
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
show examples
 funds on
sports
Use synonyms
 can sometimes even disturb the environment.
For example
Linking Words
, if the event is for one week
then
Linking Words
 for that week students will only be concerned about their performance and they will not take their courses into consideration and they will form a pile-up of work to do
Linking Words
thus
Correct your spelling
this
show examples
 ending up with
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
low scores by the end of the year. Overall, since merits outweigh the demerits the universities must try to use their grants for
sports
Use synonyms
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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