IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

You use the local swimming pool often and during one of your visit you have encountered a problem. Write a letter to the manager and say – What the problem was and when it happened – What the swimming pool staff have done about it – Suggest your own solution to the problem.

#pool #visit #manager #staff
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to draw your attention to the issue I have faced in the swimming pool recently. I am Samane, one of the Diver's club members in
Tina
Correct article usage
the Tina
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 Sports complex.
Last
 weekend, I noticed that a great number of people had swarmed to swim, which is inevitable due to summer vacations. I couldn't believe my eyes! There weren't enough lockers for the swimmers and hardly could I step inside the pool, let alone dive or swim. Deafening shouts and noises all around us had turned the place rather into a battlefield! Not surprisingly, everything was out of the staff's control.
Although
 they were doing their best by assigning each section to one person in charge, the demands were less likely to meet. I would like to respectfully suggest that you put a limit on the number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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attendees per hour, as well as extend the working hours. I mean, opening earlier, closing later
or
Correct word choice
apply
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can increase your sales and revenues. Greater demand generates revenue, but it
also
 generates a need for more work hours. I hope you address these concerns as soon as possible. Sincerely yours
Submitted by TUTOO on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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