IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

With the increasing demand for energy sources of oil and gas, peoples should look for sources of oil and gas in remote and untouched natural places. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages of damaging such areas？

#demand #energy #sources #oil #gas #peoples #places #areas？
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As the need
of
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for
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 various forms of
energy
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such
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 as oil and gas is on the rise, many people
asserts
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assert
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 that these
energy
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 resources must be explored in other unchanged nature habitats. In my opinion, there are more benefits to
this
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 approach
as
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apply
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compared to its drawbacks.
To begin
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with
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,with
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 the negatives, discovering untouched nature places to meet our demand requirement may detrimentally affect biodiversity.
This
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 is because oil and gas exploration
require
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requires
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 a lot of drilling and construction
on
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to
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fetch
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fetching
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 them from their deposits resulting
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in
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a massive amount of pollution.
For example
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, oil exploration in the Arabian
sea
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Sea
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 by the Indian government led to
sharp
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a sharp
the sharp
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 decline in
the
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apply
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aquatic life due to heightened water pollution. As a consequence, a lot of species are on the verge of extinction.
On the contrary
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, if the authorities have invested the alternative sources of
energy
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, they could meet the
energy
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 requirement without harming sea life.
Nevertheless
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, I believe, its disadvantages need to be considered
into
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in
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the
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apply
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light of
advantages
Correct pronoun usage
its advantages
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, and the most important of these is the quick response. As the
energy
Use synonyms
 requirement across the globe is increasing
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at on
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on
Correct your spelling
an
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 unparalleled pace across the globe,
this
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 time-tested approach may result in providing
speedy
Add an article
a speedy
the speedy
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 solution.
Also
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, there are huge economic benefits associated with
this
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 approach.
For example
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, petroleum and gas are among
highly
Correct article usage
the highly
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 sought commodities in the globe today due to their dependence on
energy
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 production.
As a result
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, many countries make a lot of money by exploring
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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to the
energy
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 striven countries. In conclusion,
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although
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apply
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looking for untouched areas to meet
energy
Use synonyms
 demands has resulted in
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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 disbalance due to pollution and construction activities. I believe, the perks of quick
energy
Use synonyms
 solutions and economic gains exceed the aforementioned downsides.
Submitted by yell00 on

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