Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time . This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that
teenagers
should do unpaid
community
work
in their leisure
time
and some
people
think that it has benefits both
teenagers
and society.
Although
I firmly disagree with those who think that
it
Add a verb
isit
wasit
show examples
beneficial for both of them. Some
people
have different views
Change preposition
on
show examples
whether to allow young
people
to
work
for
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
for free or not. They believe that
teenagers
working in a
community
can learn something new
like
Change preposition
about
show examples
, how to
work
in a team or they can be taught
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
experienced
people
to be ready for
real life
Add a hyphen
real-life
show examples
in
early
Correct pronoun usage
their early
show examples
years.
Moreover
, It has
also
benefit
Correct article usage
the benefit
show examples
for
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
to have
extra
Correct article usage
an extra
show examples
work-force
Correct your spelling
workforce
show examples
which is not required to pay
salary
Correct article usage
a salary
show examples
and having saved some money , the money can be sent by
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
to improve the quality of facilities or
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
.
Therefore
,
people
believe that it has not only profitable for
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
but
also
beneficial for young
people
.
However
, I would argue with those who think that
teenagers
should do unpaid
work
in their free
time
.
This
is because I think that both girls and boys have had already enough tasks in school and so they do not need to
work
in their leisure
time
.
Furthermore
, not all youth are keen on
to
Change the verb form
working
show examples
work
for free and
therefore
they should be unmotivated to do
community
work
.
Instead
, young
people
would like to spend their
time
taking courses or doing hobbies.
For example
, a teenager interested in reading books
tend
Change the verb form
tends
show examples
to think
clearly
Correct quantifier usage
more clearly
show examples
and
creatively
Correct quantifier usage
more creatively
show examples
than
Correct quantifier usage
more than
show examples
others.All in all, we should not take their
time
by forcing them to
work
in public.
Instead
, we need to give
a
Correct pronoun usage
them a
show examples
chance to look forward
them
Change preposition
to them
show examples
and decide what they want. To conclude, it is true that
teenagers
can gain some benefits working in
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
while I believe that they should not
work
in their free
time
.
Submitted by ssssssss.sanjar.2005 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • required
  • unpaid
  • community work
  • benefit
  • teenagers
  • life skills
  • volunteering
  • empathy
  • compassion
  • socially aware
  • responsible
  • interact
  • diverse backgrounds
  • cultural understanding
  • tolerance
  • work experience
  • essential skills
  • employment
  • interests
  • passions
  • career development
  • contribute
  • betterment
  • development
  • local community
  • mental well-being
  • stress
  • self-esteem
  • burden
  • academic
  • personal lives
  • time management
  • support
  • balance
  • participate
  • encouraged
  • numerous benefits
  • individuals
  • conclusion
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