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Writing Samples /
Band 4

Many animals today are being hunted to the point of extinction. What can be done to tackle this problem?

#animals #point #extinction
Since
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 animals have become vital creatures in our ecosystem.
However
,the most critical issue is now going.
That is
 faunas have
hunted
Add a missing verb
been hunted
show examples
 enormously by humans in
day
Correct article usage
the day
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today
Correct your spelling
to day
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. As some people think
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 a
bravery
Replace the word
brave
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 work to hunt species in
environment
Add an article
the environment
an environment
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. Wherever humans are
ofenly
Correct your spelling
openly
only
 using to produce medicines, ornaments and other creations by hunting animals.
Thus
,
this
 essay will focus on what are the flexible recommendations for
tackle
Wrong verb form
tackling
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 detrimental issues?
To begin
 with, governments can implement rules and regulations
for
Change preposition
to
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 overcome
this
 problem. As long as responsible law sectors have
opportunity
Correct article usage
the opportunity
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 to vanish
this
 issue by making strict standard punishments.
For example
,
a
Correct article usage
the
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Nigeria
Replace the word
Nigerian
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 government have implemented people who engage in wildlife smuggled, they are paid 10000 by lea sectors.
Therefore
, I assume that plans and schemes are more essential and beneficial to
decline
Wrong verb form
declining
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this
 wildlife trafficking
in
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around
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 the globe.
Furthermore
, local authorities must want to organize awareness programmes
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 people and
this
 will assist to get
locals
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locals'
local's
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support
Add the particle
to support
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 for face to these issues.
In addition
, schools and colleges should
be educate
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be educated
show examples
to
chlidren
Correct your spelling
children
 in their school life about
importance
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the importance
show examples
 of animal diversity to our
surround
Replace the word
surrounding
show examples
 environment.
For example
, In Srilanka school children have studied ecology subject from grade 1 to grade 11 and
this
 subject is mandatory in their school curriculum.
Consequently
, students will learn
animals
Change preposition
about animals
show examples
 and
it's
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 assistance
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 our greenery environment and they try to break these brutal issues from
community
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the community
show examples
by
Change preposition
in
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legal
Correct article usage
a legal
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 manner. In conclusion, as a
citizen
Add a comma
,citizen
show examples
 we want to follow these laws to eliminate
this
pronlem
Correct your spelling
problem
. In my perspective, unless we give our concern to faunas, we will not able to save them for our future generations.
Thus
, I believe these steps are really plausible to alleviate in our life.
Submitted by skrodrigo030 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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