IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development.

#years #shops #customers #travel #centres #malls #development
In the past few years,
people
 started
Add the particle
to like
show examples
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to go
large
Change preposition
to large
show examples
 shopping
malls
instead
 of local shops which leads to
closing
Correct article usage
the closing
show examples
 of small shops. I think it is a positive development and in the following
paragraphs
Add a comma
,paragraphs
show examples
 I would
flas
Correct your spelling
flash
 a light
over
Change preposition
on
show examples
 my views.
To begin
 with, new shopping
malls
 are
build
Wrong verb form
built
show examples
 up
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 to ease
customer's
Fix the agreement mistake
customers'
show examples
 shopping. It provides jobs to many
people
 like engineers, architecture and to
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
 after
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
 completion. So it contributes
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the economy of
country
Add an article
the country
a country
show examples
.
Second
Add an article
The second
show examples
 thing
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 infrastructure,
malls
 are
build
Wrong verb form
built
show examples
 up with new technology and safety which gives their customers assurance and lurks
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of buyers. To move forward,
people
 can enjoy a number of things there like they can do shopping,
watch
Wrong verb form
watching
show examples
Add an article
a movie
the movie
show examples
movie
Fix the agreement mistake
movies
show examples
 and other play activities.
Those
Change preposition
For those
show examples
people
 who are very busy and want to purchase things from one place, shopping
malls
 are for them. It satisfies the customer's
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
. In the
end
Add a comma
,end
show examples
 it can be said that shopping
malls
 change the way of shopping and
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
 a posting development in the society.
Submitted by navdeepkaur61906 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • retail outlets
  • consumer behavior
  • shop locally
  • convenience
  • variety
  • economic growth
  • job creation
  • community
  • personal touch
  • small businesses
  • local economy
  • big corporations
  • dependence
  • shopping habits
  • urbanization
  • globalization
  • competition
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