All fathers should be entitled to time off from work when their children are born. ‎ To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Try for free →

Nowadays, the number of births is increasing rapidly. Some people believe that taking paternity leave is important when their child is born. I completely agree with

this

Linking Words

view, because maturing

children

Use synonyms

require both emotional and physical strength , and it supports

children

Use synonyms

’s development. One of the main reasons for

this

Linking Words

is that they can provide emotional support during the early stages of bringing up an infant. Childbirth is physically and emotionally demanding for mothers.

Consequently

Linking Words

, mothers require a great deal of assistance. When

fathers

Use synonyms

take a short break from work, they can help with some responsibilities,

such

Linking Words

as house chores, take care of the newborn, and reduce the level of pressure and stress

from

Change preposition

show examples

their partner.

For example

Linking Words

, if one side needs to relax, the other one assists and helps.

As a result

Linking Words

, a supportive and healthier environment is becoming, when both of them work together. The second primary reason why

this

Linking Words

is important is that strong social bonds

between

Verb problem

exist between

show examples

children

Use synonyms

and their

fathers

Use synonyms

. Bringing up, feeding, playing, and teaching to speak is an important and a responsibility of the father. It has a profound impact on both

children

Use synonyms

’s

overall

Linking Words

well-being and their relationship in the future.

For instance

Linking Words

, some studies proved that infants who grew up with the assistance of their father were much healthier

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

their connection is strong. By caring for their

children

Use synonyms

fathers

Use synonyms

can learn some important life skills that are necessary for the development of their next infants.

Consequently

Linking Words

fathers

Use synonyms

can learn problem-solving, being responsible, and creating a meaningful environment.

To sum up

Linking Words

, I strongly agree that all father should be entitled to time off when their

children

Use synonyms

are born. It has a profound influence on not only the relationship between family, but

also

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

’s early development.

musabekovaferuza50

Jul 4, 2026

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Make your main idea more clear in some lines. A few parts are hard to follow.

coherence cohesion

Use link words more carefully. Some link words are good, but some sentences do not join in a smooth way.

task achievement

Give more direct support for your ideas. Your examples are a bit general.

task achievement

Answer the question in a more exact way. You agree clearly, but you can say more about why all fathers should have this right.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a clear end.

task achievement

You answer the question and keep your ideas on the topic.

coherence cohesion

Your two main reasons are easy to see.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produce locally Why people buy imported food ? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food ?
In many nations nowadays, there are more people who prefer imported snacks to local snacks, which derives from the better standard of foreign cuisine. However, this can be tackled by improving the quality control of local food.
7
band
Some people think that testing on animals is necessary for discovering medicine that helps fight diseases, while others believe it is not necessary to test on animals for this reason. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Even though medical equipment and knowledge have evolved, numerous new diseases are discovered and need to be addressed. For this matter, an argument appears regarding the medicine testing on animals. Some people believe that testing is essential to check the effectiveness while the other group think it is unnecessary. I believe that both opinions have pros and cons, and I stand with the idea of testing medicine on non-human subjects.
8
band
The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?
There has been considerable debate about whether the working week should be
7
band
Some people think that a person can never understand the culture of a country unless they speak the language. Do you agree with this opinion
As technology develops, nothing remains untouched, and the way of getting familiar with other cultures is no exception. While some opine that the only way people can become aware of other nations is through learning their languages, I strongly believe other options, like travelling, reading books, and even the internet, are too important to be overlooked.
7
band
It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about other cultures of other people. We can learn just as much as from books, films, and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?
Some people believe that the best ways to learn about other countries are different sources of information such as the internet or literature than attending these places yourself. This essay disagrees with this statement because books and pictures do not give you the same knowledge and feelings as travelling, and you cannot try foreign food.

All fathers should be entitled to time off from work when their children are born. ‎ To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produce locally Why people buy imported food ? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food ?

Some people think that testing on animals is necessary for discovering medicine that helps fight diseases, while others believe it is not necessary to test on animals for this reason. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a person can never understand the culture of a country unless they speak the language. Do you agree with this opinion

It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about other cultures of other people. We can learn just as much as from books, films, and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?