Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In today's world,
music
has been playing
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
role in human lives.There are lots of opportunities to listen
and
Change preposition
to and
show examples
share
music
.
People
can discover new
types
and they can like these.
Thus
,
people
can enjoy different
types
of
music
and it can bring
cultures
and ages together.
First
of all,
music
Add an article
the music
show examples
industry has
a
Change the article
an
show examples
important place in our lives.
People
listen to
music
while working,studying or walking.
Correct your spelling
Instead
show examples
In stead
Correct your spelling
Instead
show examples
of lots of
music
types
,
people
can
listen
Add the preposition
tolisten
show examples
child songs or other cultural songs.
Therefore
,
music
can help
bringing
Wrong verb form
bring
show examples
people
together.
For example
, there is a
famus
Correct your spelling
famous
application called Tiktok.Many
people
around the world
hava
Correct your spelling
have
been using
this
application to share
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
videos.When they share videos,use different
types
of
music
and many
people
comment and they can meet each other.
Thus
, cultural and
ages
Change the noun form
age
show examples
differences can decrease.
Secondly
,musical entertainments are very popular
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these days.Many companies
orginise
Correct your spelling
organise
events to show different
cultures
.Parents can join
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their children to teach new
cultures
.If they join these events,they and their children can meet foreign
people
.
Thus
,different
cultures
and ages can be minimized.
For instance
,there is a meeting club in my
counrty
Correct your spelling
country
.
People
who desire to learn new cultural things can go there.There is a wide range age of
people
there and
eveyone
Correct your spelling
everyone
wants to learn something new. In conclusion,
I'm strongly
Change the verb form
I strongly agree
show examples
agree
Add the preposition
onagree
toagree
withagree
show examples
this
statement.
People
can bring together and they can minimize their own cultural level via
music
.
Submitted by ardacelik98 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
What to do next:
Look at other essays: