IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Without capital punishment (the death penalty) our lives are less secure and crimes of violence increase. Capital punishment is essential to control violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#punishment #death #penalty #lives #crimes #violence #control #society
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The graph presents the data on the number of
times
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 the fast
food
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 eaten from 1975 to 2000 by Australian teenagers.
At
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In
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 the beginning,
fish
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 and
chips
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was
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were
show examples
 the most popular followed by
pizza
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 and
hamburgers
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. But in the following years,
times
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 eaten for
pizza
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 and
hamburgers
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 steadily rise with
times
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 eaten for
fish
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 and
chips
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 decrease sharply in the contrast. In 2000,
hamburgers
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 becomes the most popular
food
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 with
pizza
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at
Change preposition
in
show examples
second
Linking Words
 place.
Firstly
Linking Words
, from 1975 to 1980,
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times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 eaten
for
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apply
show examples
fish
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 and
chips
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 is around 90 per year for teenagers,
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times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 eaten
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
hamburgers
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 and
pizza
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 are
continuely
Correct your spelling
continually
 growing and
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nearly 80 and 40 per year in 1980.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in the following decade,
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times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 eaten for
fish
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 and
chips
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 drop rapidly while
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Correct article usage
the times
show examples
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 eaten for the other two fast
food
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 are steadily increasing. Around 1985,
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times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 eaten for hamburger intersects with
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times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 eaten for
fish
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 and
chips
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,
then
Linking Words
 leave
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 behind. About five years later,
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times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 eaten for
pizza
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 does the same
for
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as
show examples
times
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 eaten for
fish
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 and
chips
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.
Lastly
Linking Words
, from 1990 to 2000, on one side,
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times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
 eaten for
hamburgers
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 and
pizza
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 reach the peak at 100 and 80
seperately
Correct your spelling
separately
 and remain. On the other side,
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Correct article usage
the times
show examples
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 eaten for
fish
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 and
chips
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 still decreasing and
reach
Correct subject-verb agreement
reaches
show examples
 hit the rock bottom at 40 in the end. To sum up,
australian
Change the capitalization
Australian
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 teenagers love
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fish
Add the particle
to fish
show examples
 and
chips
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initially
Linking Words
, but they transfer their interest to
hamburgers
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 and
pizza
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 in the following years. Ultimately,
hamburgers
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 become the
food
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 they like the most, with
fish
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 and
chips
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is
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 the least
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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