Today, in spite of the scientifically proven necessity of life-long learning, the idea that innate intelligence (thinking skills) is enough to have a successful life is dominating the minds of people. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Majority
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The majority
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of people
believes
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believe
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that inherited natural intelligence is enough to have fortunate life despite the proven necessity of
life-long
Correct your spelling
lifelong
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learning.
This
essay will
first
suggest that the main problems caused by
this
phenomenon are possible lack of qualified
personal
Replace the word
personnel
show examples
in future and rising of unintelligent
generation
and
then
argue that granting working places for educated people and proper promotion of academic life are
most
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the most
show examples
efficient ways of solution. If
essential
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an essential
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part of
population
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the population
show examples
doesn’t regard big attention to tutoring,
only
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an only
show examples
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
proportion of people will be well educated. Complicated professions which
claims
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claim
show examples
deep knowledge in some spheres will be vacant. It
also
will cause the
grow
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growth
show examples
of
unintelligent
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an unintelligent
show examples
generation
.
Low
Add an article
The low
A low
show examples
value of schooling among
new
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the new
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generation
will result in their engagement in
education
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the education
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process. Representatives of
new
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the new
a new
show examples
generation
will not study hard and according to
latest
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the latest
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researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
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of
Change preposition
by
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Harvard, their brain development will be decelerated.
Essential
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An essential
The essential
show examples
factor of not studying is being afraid that you will not work
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
your studied profession so granting relevant working places for senior students will motivate them to study what they want. Promotion of academic life means that fields of science will be
showed
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shown
show examples
in order to engage children to study and help to find students sphere that will interest them.
Low
Add an article
The low
A low
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attitude of
life-long
Correct article usage
the life-long
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learning phenomenon is
valid
Add an article
a valid
the valid
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problem nowadays which can cause problems
such
as
deficiency
Correct article usage
the deficiency
show examples
of qualified masters and
‘mindless’
Correct article usage
the ‘mindless’
show examples
generation
.
Submitted by Zhbiroksana on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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