Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children's development than playing computer games. What extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #activities #children #development #computer #games

It is argued that

children

should spend most of their

time

playing outdoor

games

instead

of indoor

games

. I

also

agree with

this

statement that doing physical

activities

has countless benefits for offspring's mental and physical development.

Firstly

, participation in outdoor

activities

improves

children

's health.

In other words

, if offspring invest maximum hours in exercise outdoors, they will breathe in the fresh air, which helps to build up their immune system.

Also

, these days , young ones

face

obesity issues ,so outdoor pursuits can help to prevent

this

problem.

Consequently

,Outdoor sports are more important for

children

's development.

This

is because physical fitness has become a key factor in

children

's lives.

For example

, a survey conducted by Oxford University, with the help of school students who do outdoor movement in their daily routine found that they are more creative and fit as compared to other students.

Moreover

, outdoor exercise not only enhances physical fitness but

also

interpersonal skills. To explain it, when

children

play outside,

then

they can interact

face

with other people .

Hence

, these situations can teach them lots of things

such

as communication skills, cooperation and teamwork, which can be useful in their future professional life .

As a result

, if juveniles more

time

on computer

games

then

they will be deprived of these benefits and

also

face

some help issues,

such

as being overweight and having eyesight problems.

Thus

, young people can save precious

time

by investing in outdoor

activities

. In conclusion , youngsters who spend too much

time

on computer

games

can suffer from mental illness,

therefore

, outdoor

activities

are more fruitful for

children

's growth .

Submitted by lvpreetxsmax on Sat May 14 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children's development than playing computer games. What extent do you agree or disagree.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people believe that learning a foreign language is a very difficult task. What are the most difficult things about learning a foreign language? What is the best way to overcome them?

People today are able to take out loans from the bank or get a credit card very easily. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this practice?

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Some people think that going to a fitness centers regularly is unnecessary. Instead they believe the combining occasional exercise (such as going for walk) with a balanced diet is enough to stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree.