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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that children should obey the rules or do what their parents and teachers want them to do. Some people think that children controlled very much cannot deal with problems themselves.

#people #children #rules #parents #teachers
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Certain folks believe that teachers and their
parents
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 should make children under their control to obey all the rules and demands but some others think
this
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 type of behaviour will end up in a problem like a child cannot handle his problems alone. In my opine,
parents
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 should leave options for their
kids
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 to choose what they want. To commence with, in recent decades, families are getting nuclear and the number of
kids
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 is
also
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 limited to one or two and because of that
parents
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 are becoming more and more protective. Due to
this
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 phenomenon, the majority of
kids
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 in
this
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 era end up in a state called broilers. These generations do only things that they are asked to do. They are very poor in using their own intellect.
For instance
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, studies say students bought up in a
freedom
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 atmosphere have more EQ than others. So for their proper
Correct your spelling
intelligence
inteligence
Add a comma
,inteligence
show examples
 each pupil should experience the
freedom
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 to take decisions. Even though
parents
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 and teachers should teach each ward about what is good and bad and what is important about obeying elders.But people who are grown under too much parental control face difficulty in facing their personal and professional issues. These groups always seek
other's
Fix the agreement mistake
others'
show examples
 opinions and do not show guests to take decisions.
For example
Linking Words
, a well obedient child who has never taken any decision on their own will not show the courage to
take
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
 decisions for his own personal
life
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 even after marriage. Decision making is very important for one's own
life
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. To summarize,
freedom
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 is important in every stage of
life
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. So people who enjoyed decision
freedom
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 can reach heights of
life
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 easily and I strongly disagree with
parents
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 who are strictly following their
kids
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 to obey rules.
Submitted by BINI K ISSAC on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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