All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

#world #societies #obesity #children #adults #rise

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, being overweight in all age groups is becoming a concerning issue throughout the world. Obesity has been caused by various factors like sedentary lifestyle, fast food and work-related stress. In

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I am looking at these reasons and suggesting some solutions. One of the main causes of

this

Linking Words

problem is that people are approaching a more inactive lifestyle due to high-tech electronic gadgets.

for example

Linking Words

, playing attractive computer games which have the best graphics is becoming more fashionable amongst children rather than doing sports. The solution is for the parents and school authorities to enhance knowledge about the pivotal role of physical activities in keeping fit and staying healthy. Another reason arises from unhealthy foods that have been so popular.

Although

Linking Words

fast foods are more affordable, these kinds of food can lead to detrimental health issues

such

Linking Words

as excessive overweight because of its high unsaturated fat and processed ingredients.

Hence

Linking Words

, the government should make major strides like producing TV programs and launching campaigns to increase public awareness about the drawbacks of fast food. A

third

Linking Words

cause of the problem is that individuals are experiencing a hectic lifestyle in modern societies. Which means that they have been exposed to a variety of stressors.

As a result

Linking Words

, some disease

such

Linking Words

as obesity has risen remarkably. To tackle

this

Linking Words

issue, public health authorities should encourage people to have a work-life balance.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the government should monitor working hour policies in the companies and can impose employees who overwork their staff. To sum up, being obese has become a crucial matter

as a result

Linking Words

of changes in our way of life, due to reasons

such

Linking Words

as technology progression and lack of physical activities

in addition

Linking Words

to consumption of junk foods. My view is that the main responsibility for solving

this

Linking Words

concern lies with the government and public health authorities.

Submitted by sheyda.mallah on Tue May 24 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

307 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Obesity
Overweight
Epidemic
Sedentary
Processed food
Fast food
Nutritional education
Awareness
Stress
Emotional eating
Genetic factors
Access
Healthy food options
Marketing
Urbanization
Lifestyles

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Some people think that human needs for farmland, housing, and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals. Do you agree or disagree with this point of view?
In recent years, the utilization of land has been drastically changing due to varied needs of human population. Although some people believe that land can be cleared to fufill the growing needs of human beings, others are of the opinion that it should be protected to save wildlife especially extincting species. In my opinion, it is highly crucial to protect endangered animals so as to maintain ecological balance.
4.5
band
In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing Do you think this is a positive or a negative development
In last years, many people leaved their rural town and moved to cities. This phenomenon identified in many countries around the world. From my point of view, this phenomenon represent a positive development for some reasons.
7
band
It is sometimes said people should be encouraged to get married before the age of 30 as it is best for society.do u agree or disagree
The question of whether people ought to be married before the age of 30, as per societal standards, has sparked a substantial debate around the world. While some advocate for this, others contend against it. I firmly support the latter standpoint, because early marriage eliminates individual potential, as well as that most people do not fall in love around that age.
4
band
WORK: Most high level positions in companies are filled by men, even though the workforce in many developed countries consists of 50 percent female workers. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of management positions to women. Discuss, what is your opinion?
There is no doubt that intellectually women are equal to the men. Many business establishment around the globe, undeniably,managing by male, despite the fact that 50 percent of workforce are female. some people subsrcribe to the idea that the certain percentage of management position should be reserved for women. I strongly agree this view, and this essy will delve into both viewpoints with relevant examples.
5
band
Many offenders commit more crimes after serving their first punishment. Why is this happening and what measures can be taken?
It is true that there has been increasingly more in the rate of committing crimes after imprisonment. Although there will undoubtedly be some negative consequences of this solution, steps can be taken to mitigate this potential problem.

All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

Your opinion

Some people think that human needs for farmland, housing, and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals. Do you agree or disagree with this point of view?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

It is sometimes said people should be encouraged to get married before the age of 30 as it is best for society.do u agree or disagree

WORK: Most high level positions in companies are filled by men, even though the workforce in many developed countries consists of 50 percent female workers. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of management positions to women. Discuss, what is your opinion?

Many offenders commit more crimes after serving their first punishment. Why is this happening and what measures can be taken?