•Successful sports professionals, such as football stars, earn much higher salaries than people in other important professions. Some people think this is unjustified and unfair. What is your own opinion.

#•successful #sports #professionals #football #stars #salaries #people #professions

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

•Successful sports professionals,

such

Linking Words

football

Use synonyms

stars, earn much higher salaries than

people

Use synonyms

in other important professions. Some

people

Use synonyms

think

this

Linking Words

is unjustified and unfair. What is your own opinion

Change the punctuation

show examples

First

Linking Words

, no one would argue that

football

Use synonyms

is a great source of

entartainment

Correct your spelling

entertainment

, and

entartaining

Correct your spelling

entertaining

is a great investment globally.

Foorballers

Correct your spelling

Footballers

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

always play an important role in helping

people

Use synonyms

forget about their daily life stresses, for that

people

Use synonyms

, unawarely, reward them by buying tickets

Change preposition

for

show examples

the matches they

attends

Change the verb form

attend

show examples

, buying sports costume even following their pages and accounts on different social platforms.

Thus

Linking Words

football

Use synonyms

players would have a high income, for the enjoyments they provide to their fans.

Second

Linking Words

, in my opinion,

Although

Linking Words

footballers seem to earn

high

Correct article usage

a high

show examples

income, more than the effort they do,

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

, in fact, they are not able to play until they get retired.

Footbal

Correct your spelling

Football

,as a sport, needs high body abilities and skill performance, so hardly ever a

football

Use synonyms

player

Use synonyms

would able to play soccer over

fourty

Correct your spelling

forty

of his age.

In other words

Linking Words

football

Use synonyms

player

Fix the agreement mistake

players

show examples

should be able to save money for the rest of their life.

Finally

Linking Words

football

Use synonyms

clubs are big business projects

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

owned

Add a missing verb

are owned

show examples

by billionaires, and players are the main characters in the project.

Football

Use synonyms

teams are not going to have lots of fans without big the big superstars playing for them, and Whenever a

football

Use synonyms

club signs a contract with a

player

Use synonyms

, they bear in mind to earn much more money from the contract than the amount of salary they give the

player

Use synonyms

Submitted by ghazi.lina on Tue May 24 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

253 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Educating young people is naturally important. However, some think governments ought to invest more in education for adults in need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is true that education plays a vital role in the development of every child. While some argue that education for adults should be more emphasized and get more attention from the government, I believe this is only suitable for developed nations and not that much necessary in the developing ones.
4
band
everyone should be encouraged to use fewer resources rather than recycle more. To what extent do you agree?
Nowadays, there are many resources that are available to everyone, which causes damage to the earth. This problem is just being recognised and people argue weather they should consume fewer resources or be encouraged to recycle more. I believe using fewer resources has a more beneficial impact on the environment.
5.5
band
Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Do you think that this is a positive or negative development?
Majorities of the countries went to the same problem, which is the decreasing number of people in rural areas because of mass urbanization from the countryside to the urban cities. In my opinion, this issue results in detrimental side effects such as the high gap of infrastructures and economic equality in each area.
6.5
band
Traffic and housing problems could be solved by moving large companies, factories and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree?
There is a strong argument that shifting substantial industries and factories to rural areas can be a solver for traffic and housing problems in urban areas. I completely agree with the statement because it can reduce traffic congestion in big cities and solve problems for workers to buy houses. In this essay, I will discuss more details about it.
7.5
band
IN SOME COUNTRIES MORE AND MORE PEOPLE ARE BECOMING INTERESTED IN FINDING OUT ABOUT THE HISTORY OF THE HOUSE OR BUILDING THEY LIVE IN. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THIS? HOW CAN PEOPLE RESEARCH THIS?
IN SOME COUNTRIES, THERE IS A GROWING NUMBER OF PEOPLE FINDING THE HISTORY OF THEIR HOMES. IN MY OPINION, THEY RESEARCH THIS FOR THE FOLLOWING BASIS, PERHAPS FOR SAFETY AND SECURITY REASONS. IN HELPING TO FIND ANSWERS FOR THIS, THEY COULD ASK THE PREVIOUS OWNERS OR THEIR NEIGHBORS AND LOCAL GOVERNMENT.

•Successful sports professionals, such as football stars, earn much higher salaries than people in other important professions. Some people think this is unjustified and unfair. What is your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Educating young people is naturally important. However, some think governments ought to invest more in education for adults in need. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

everyone should be encouraged to use fewer resources rather than recycle more. To what extent do you agree?

Around the world, rural people are moving to cities and urban areas, so populations in the countryside are decreasing. Do you think that this is a positive or negative development?

Traffic and housing problems could be solved by moving large companies, factories and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree?

IN SOME COUNTRIES MORE AND MORE PEOPLE ARE BECOMING INTERESTED IN FINDING OUT ABOUT THE HISTORY OF THE HOUSE OR BUILDING THEY LIVE IN. WHAT ARE THE REASONS FOR THIS? HOW CAN PEOPLE RESEARCH THIS?