IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Many people believe that social networking sites have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

#people #sites #impact #individuals #society
These days,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and different kind of
sites
 are used widely among
people
. Many
people
 believe that these apps have
adverse
Add an article
an adverse
show examples
 impact on both
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 and
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
. These effects are increasing dramatically. I totally agree with
this
 situation and will discuss my point of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
 below. To start with, advancement in technology brings
plethora
Add an article
a plethora
show examples
 of comforts
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 one's life. Many individuals use these networks negatively
such
 as developing bad habits by totally depending on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
, plagiarism by
coping
Correct your spelling
copying
show examples
Change preposition
with others
show examples
others
Change noun form
others'
other's
show examples
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 as well as laziness.
Furthermore
, companies use many
sites
such
 as Indeed or Zip recruiter by giving fake advertisements to sell their products.
In
Change preposition
For
show examples
 instance, there are many fake makeup
sites
 which
includes
Change the verb form
include
show examples
saffora
Correct your spelling
Safford
saffron
,
attract
Fix the infinitive
to attract
show examples
 customers to sell their fake products.
Secondly
, social
sites
also
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 a huge negative effect on society.
People
beomes
Correct your spelling
becomes
become
 jealous
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 others by seeing their posts on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
such
 as on Instagram or telegram. Apart from that, some individuals start participating in gangs which causes
adverse
Add an article
an adverse
show examples
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
 on children in the community.
For example
, youngsters
impacted
Add a missing verb
are impacted
show examples
 a lot by seeing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gang style
Add a hyphen
gang-style
show examples
 videos on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 which can lead to disputes in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. To sum up, it is clear that the advancement in technology and
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 a negative effect on
people
 and society. I believe that
this
 problem should
be combat
Change the verb form
be combated
show examples
 as soon as well,
otherwise
 it will become more adverse.
Submitted by kaursandeep79561 on

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social isolation
  • virtual interactions
  • mental health
  • feelings of inadequacy
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • misinformation
  • destabilize
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • productivity
  • foster connections
  • educational content
  • social activism
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