Every year, thousands of students go overseas to study. Although many benefit from the experience, others go home disappointed. What are the benefits and drawbacks of studying in another country?

#year #thousands #students #study #benefit #home #country

In recent years, we have seen a considerable rise in the number of

students

going overseas to study. In spite of the fact that studying abroad brings many benefits, getting

drawbacks

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

undeniable.

However

, I believe the benefits outweigh the

drawbacks

. On the one hand, there are many reasons why studying abroad should be encouraged. First of all, for a good long-term investment, getting a foreign qualification would provide ample opportunities to find a well-paid

job

, resulting in higher income and enhancing our personal value.

For example

according to

the statistics of

job

search websites in Vietnam,

almost

Correct your spelling

most

show examples

job

positions with competitive salaries refer to people who have had overseas experiences.

Moreover

, studying abroad would bring

students

close to foreign cultures,

new

Correct word choice

and new

show examples

languages and meet lots of people in the world which give

students

a wider knowledge to apply in their future

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

On the other hand

, going overseas to study

bear

Correct subject-verb agreement

bears

show examples

many problems physical

as well as

mental for

students

Firstly

, physical health, the changing weather in a new

live

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

place could

be affected

Wrong verb form

affect

show examples

the physical well-being of

students

. For

instants

Replace the word

instance

show examples

, moving from the tropics to the temperate zone causes the possibility of catching a cold for a long time.

Secondly

, mental health,

getting

Verb problem

apply

show examples

homesickness, language problems and the lack of friends at the beginning of time living in a foreign country cause mental inhibition. These reasons, lead to an increase in the number of suicidal

students

abroad. In conclusion,

although

it is true that studying abroad still has some

drawbacks

however

, in my opinion, there are many good benefits which outweigh the

drawbacks

encourage

Wrong verb form

encouraging

show examples

students

should study in foreign countries.

Submitted by anhvuqsk on Wed May 25 2022

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Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay addresses the benefits and drawbacks of studying abroad effectively, providing relevant examples and arguments. However, be sure to clearly address both the benefits and drawbacks in separate paragraphs for a more cohesive structure.

Task Achievement

You have presented a well-rounded response to the essay prompt, covering both the benefits and drawbacks of studying abroad. However, to improve your task achievement score, ensure that you provide a balanced discussion of both sides and maintain a clear focus on the task throughout your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Every year, thousands of students go overseas to study. Although many benefit from the experience, others go home disappointed. What are the benefits and drawbacks of studying in another country?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people feel that good training courses can make anyone a teacher, while others say that good teachers cannot be produced by simply following a training course. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.

People are becoming too dependent on the Internet and phone. Is it a positive or negative development?

Parents and teachers make many rules for children to encourage good behaviour and to protect them from danger. However, children would benefit from fewer rules and greater freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that all secondary and higher secondary school students should be taught how to manage money as it is an important life skill. Do you agree or disagree with this argument?