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Band 4.5

Some people think that public libraries are not necessary whereas others believe that they are essential for people. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#people #libraries
Many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
 think
librarys
Correct your spelling
libraries
 are not necessary for us, and they should not build
any more
Correct your spelling
anymore
show examples
.
Nevertheless
, others myself included
extrermelly
Correct your spelling
extremely
 believe
librarys
Correct your spelling
libraries
library
cary's
Correct your spelling
city's
Cary's
 many advantages for our society
Firstly
, there are many benefits that the
library
 gives us. One major benefit is the
library
 mostly are free to
use
 or browsing
books
 is very cheap. As today with soaring prices of
books
 buying them is more expensive than ever, and public
libraries
 could cover the expenses.
Also
, many
people
 could
use
 the
library
's free reading rooms which they should spend enormous money sometimes on reading in privet study rooms.
Secondly
, public
libraries
 benefit
many
Replace the quantifier
much
show examples
 special
range
Change to a plural noun
ranges
show examples
 of
people
 in public ,
for example
, disabled
people
 could
use
 the benefits of
libraries
 as they are disabled
people
 friendly and easy to
use
. Other than that, most of
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these libraries
show examples
library
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 located in nice places.
Therefore
,
people
 have the possibility of using them with ease and very convenience
Thirdly
, most the public
libraries
 around the globe are keeping many precious materials
such
 as old
books
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
some of which have more than a hundred years.
This
 does not only encourage
people
 to care more about literature but
also
, provides them with a chance of studying and visiting these old
books
.
For instance
, many significant materials are kept in
Canada
Change noun form
Canada's
show examples
 national
laibrary
Correct your spelling
library
 some of
whitch
Correct your spelling
which
 are
coleceted
Correct your spelling
collected
 from different places in the world. All in all, even though many believe that public
libraries
 are not necessary for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society but I totally agree with the notion of the usefulness of
libraries
.
Submitted by parafik on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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