IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

To meet the growing need for food to support an increasing population, a country should make use of edible insects as a food source. However, some people believe that insects are not only unhealthy but harvesting them will also negatively affect nature. What are the benefits and drawbacks of eating insects? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#food #support #population #country #insects #source #people #nature
Due to meet the growing need for
food
 to support an increasing population, Fascinating that some countries have
Add an article
a culture
the culture
show examples
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
 to
make
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
 use of edible
insects
 as a
food
 source.
However
, some
people
 believe that
insects
 are not only unhealthy but harvesting them will
also
 negatively affect nature. In the following paragraph, I will explain
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 outweigh
drawbacks
Correct article usage
the drawbacks
show examples
 of eating
insects
 Eating
insects
 can save our world from
starvations
Fix the agreement mistake
starvation
show examples
.
Insects
 can be a good source of
food
 to feed
people
 around the world. In many parts of the world , we see
people
 starving and
die
Wrong verb form
dying
show examples
 because of the lack of
food
 resources.
Insects
 can be a solution to help
people
 to survive in the middle and east of Africa. The increasing population around the globe will make it more difficult for the poor to find
food
.
Moreover
, some
insects
 approve from scientific research that
its
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 contain a lot of protein
nutrient
Fix the agreement mistake
nutrients
show examples
.
Howevers
Correct your spelling
However
, There are a lot of mistake
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
 from
news
Correct article usage
the news
show examples
 affect
people
feel
Fix the infinitive
to feel
show examples
 unreliable as same as
mass
Correct article usage
the mass
show examples
 hysteria effect. Rich
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 maybe look down on
people
 who eat
insects
 in rural areas. To solve the problems I think that scientific experiments can reduce the negative effects that can
endager
Correct your spelling
endanger
 nature by harvesting
insecting
Correct your spelling
inspecting
insects
. Reproducing, healthy
insects
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 farms will help to keep the natural balance. Improving
Food
 products that are based upon
insects
 can change the negative point of view toward eating
insects
.
Artifical
Correct your spelling
Artificial
 taste and attractive flavour can attract
people
 to eat these products.
Submitted by first.kantapat on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: