Some people believe that it is important to spend money on family celebrations such as weddings and birthdays, while others think this is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #money #celebrations #weddings #birthdays #waste

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Views often differ on how to preserve within-family connections for good. Whereas expensive

cozy

Change the spelling

cosy

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gatherings are thought to be

Change the article

apply

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essential, I am of the notion that

money

Use synonyms

in there means nothing at all. On the one hand, there are certain justifications for

Add an article

the expense

an expense

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expense

Fix the agreement mistake

expenses

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to be spent on family celebrations. The main one will undoubtedly be the once-in-a-while pleasance offered to the members.

This

Linking Words

is to say that there is not much family quality time to be squandered,

thus

Linking Words

Remove the article

apply

show examples

accumulating spending on,

for instance

Linking Words

, a close-knit vacation at a 5-star hotel, could already become a source of motivation to keep up anyone’s good work. More importantly, memories with

such

Linking Words

beloved people are of uncomparable preciousness. As a consequence, treasuring them in the most unique way, which is only available with loads of

money

Use synonyms

invested in anniversaries, would never be abortive.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I am personally more prone to the belief that spending

money

Use synonyms

on bondings is a total waste for a couple of rationales.

Firstly

Linking Words

, it is of more use to save up for other subsistence fees. Looking at the reality, it is evident that famine, overpopulation,etc are still the concerns of countless households, let alone

to have

Change the verb form

having

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enough

and

Correct word choice

apply

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to spare.

Consequently

Linking Words

, there is no point drastically jumping into

such

Linking Words

expense

then

Linking Words

get

Wrong verb form

getting

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oneself in the red. On top of all,

money

Use synonyms

has never been the decisive factor. It is love, it is the true affection

lies

Correct pronoun usage

that lies

show examples

in each and every person’s heart, reminding them of the past and empowering them to overcome whatever is ahead. In conclusion, it is indeed crucial to maintain the

tranquility

Change the spelling

tranquillity

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between family members.

However

Linking Words

, it would still be a more positive scenario

were

Correct your spelling

where

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people aware of the limits and the true values of ‘family’.

Submitted by linhke3405 on Thu May 26 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

294 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural heritage
commemorate
festivities
bonding experience
financial strain
budget-friendly
sustainable celebrations
social dynamics
peer pressure
materialism

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Some people believe that it is important to spend money on family celebrations such as weddings and birthdays, while others think this is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

In many parts of the world, there is not enough food for everyone. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Scientists and technology experts seem to be more valued by modern society than musician and artists.

You bought a piece of furniture from a store in another town recently. there is a problem with the item you purchased. write a letter to the store manager. in your letter Explain the details of your purchase. Describe the problem that you have with it suggest what can be done about it

Education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However, educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?