Many blieve that living in a city offers greater benefits compared to life the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#blieve #city #life #countryside

With the acceleration of industrialization and the advancement of countries, nowadays,

cities

have been developing over the years.

Therefore

, A large portion of people is convinced that there are far more opportunities and dramatic shifts in

cities

rather than villages. As far as I am concerned, I am strongly in agreement with those who think the urban

areas

are cosier and better to live in the countryside. On the one hand, currently, most government principals have been doing their best to develop and improve the metropolises to keep abreast with other developed countries. What I mean by

this

, first and foremost the infrastructure

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

belongs to developing countries, is boosted and advanced perfectly by providing the population with gas, electricity and water supply which are extremely crucial and vital for living better.

Furthermore

, the majority of the high-rise flats, council estates and tower blocks are constructed and designed by the government to allow for each family living in the

city

as well as

,naturally

city

dwellers possess some extra services

such

as heating

system

Fix the agreement mistake

systems

show examples

, fresh water and internet connection.

Hence

, all of them are not ubiquitous in rural

areas

, since the state is not stimulated to implement some new changes, so many people complain with regard to exacerbating villages.

On the other hand

, in suburban

areas

, the education system is not well-developed and well-endowed,

also

, the number of workplaces is paltry and good for nothing. There, a large portion of folk does agricultural

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

like growing vegetation, sowing fruit trees, collecting the crops and selling agricultural products to buyers who come from the

city

, trading down.

However

, these days, there are a number of vacancies for unemployed people in developing

cities

and

besides

, parents in

cities

are capable of providing their children with good quality of life and education.

To sum up

, I personally think, it is undoubtedly that the living condition in the

city

is much better than in villages.

Also

, the government should do its utmost to improve the harsh rural

areas

Submitted by uluga2002 on Thu May 26 2022

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task response

The task response should be more balanced, with a discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of living in the city compared to the countryside.

coherence and cohesion

The coherence and cohesion could be improved by using more transition words and phrases to link ideas and create a smoother flow of information.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

334 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

5.5

Logical structure

6.5

Introduction & conclusion present

5.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

5.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many blieve that living in a city offers greater benefits compared to life the countryside. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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