The best way to improve health is to do regular exercise. To what extent do you agree?

#health #exercise

Nowadays, a lot of

people

are interested in doing

exercise

. I strongly agree that it is the best way to promote your health by doing regular

exercise

To begin

with, doing regular

exercise

is a great benefit for our health.

Firstly

people

are working in the office the whole day . If

people

are not doing any physical activities regularly, they will become fat and

higher

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at higher

show examples

risk of diseases

such

as obesity and heart attack.

In other words

exercise

balance

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balances

show examples

our body and improve

Correct article usage

the body

show examples

body

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body's

show examples

immunse

Correct your spelling

immune

system. It can manage our blood sugar and adjust insulin

level

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levels

show examples

. Doing

workout

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workouts

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eveyday

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everyday

every day

, we are more active and more productive as you will increase your creative thinking.

Moreover

, we are

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apply

show examples

fitter and get a good-looking structure so

this

can increase our

confident

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confidence

show examples

Secondly

, another benefit of doing

physicial

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physical

activies

Correct your spelling

activities

is to

relief

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relieve

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your stress. Due to the advent of technology and a lot of

people

have

busy

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a busy

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schedule, they

irritates

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irritate

show examples

in a small

such

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apply

show examples

thing.

Physicial

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Physical

Physician

activity helps our

sympton

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symptom

symptoms

of stress and removes those

symptons

Correct your spelling

symptoms

Exercise

can help to

lossen

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loosen

lessen

our muscles and removes the pain.

Regualr

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Regular

exercise

help

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helps

show examples

symptons

Correct your spelling

symptoms

and improve your mood. In a nutshell, doing regular

exercise

not only

reduce

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reduces

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our stress but

also

protect the diseases. Due to

the

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this

show examples

fact, I believe that physical activity

which

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apply

show examples

is a great way of improving our health.

Submitted by eiphyo2021 on Sat May 28 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

226 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The best way to improve health is to do regular exercise. To what extent do you agree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Some people think it is better for children to grow up in the city, while others think that life in the countryside for children is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places for children to grow up?