Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to more school work. How do you think children should spend their free time?

#people #children #time #school #work

Time

is of the essence, and everyone should use it wisely. Some

people

think that because

children

have plenty of spare

time

they need to do extra school work. I,

however

, do not believe that studying is the optimum use of these valuable hours. Rather, the young could socialize, play or read for fun.

First

of all, if

children

spent more school hours, they would burn out faster,

thus

their educational performance would decline.

Instead

, they could use their free

time

to socialize and play with others of their age group. They could go to the park,

for instance

, and spend

time

with their classmates or neighbours' sons and daughters.

As a result

, they would get a chance to not only develop their communication skills

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

to enjoy their

time

doing so.

Moreover

, there are other ways by which

children

can benefit from their free

time

without putting too much pressure on them. Recreational reading is one of these activities. The publishing industry,

for example

, releases a wide variety of

children

's books, which are categorized based on age and genres. In my opinion,

although

reading can seem dull to some

people

, it does wonders to a child's imagination.

In addition

, it has been proven to develop

people

's creativity, empathy and cognitive functions. In conclusion, even though some

people

believe that

children

should spend their free

time

on school work, I totally disagree with them. Beneficial alternatives could be meeting up with their friends, or reading novels and short stories tailored specifically for them.

Submitted by aymanshabakaa on Sun May 29 2022

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

unstructured free time
creativity
mental health development
extracurricular activities
well-rounded development
sports
arts
social skills
family time
emotional growth
relationship building
rest and leisure
academic performance
burnout

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Some people believe that children are given too much free time. They feel that this time should be used to more school work. How do you think children should spend their free time?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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