IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many people think that if plenty of death system introduce in country the crimate rate get decrease. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #plenty #death #system #country #crimate #rate #decrease
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It is believed by some that government should enrol on the punishment of the
death
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 system if anyone commits serious criminal
activities
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. I completely agree with the given statement and I assume that by giving
such
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 a serious penalized public get afraid of losing their lives as well as become aware and do not engage in
such
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 activity
activities
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Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
activities
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.
First
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 of all, I deem that if the administration introduces plenty of
death
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 systems in the nation criminals are thinking most of the time involved in
such
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activities
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 due to being afraid of losing their life.
Moreover
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, the crime rate declined day by day. Specifically,
this
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 assists to boost the state and citizens are capable to spend their life freely without burden.
For example
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, a most enormous county like America, India as well as Canada have implemented the hang till
death
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 system if anyone does serious evil
activities
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such
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 as rape
otherwise
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 murder.
Consequently
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, no
such
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 issues are seen.
Besides
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,
this
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 person becomes aware and they do not engage in the sector of crime.
In addition
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, citizens are commenced to teach themselves that if humans involve in dreadful things they are unable to save their lives.
For instance
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, with the aid of technology individuals get information that if human beings conduct
such
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activities
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 it is so detrimental to the journey.,
,
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apply
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Furthermore
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 I can
also
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 see that myriad of countries that have
such
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 a system have enough crime. To conclude, I reaffirm my position by stating that through the announcement of the
death
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 rule in the state criminals avoid dismal
activities
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.
Hence
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, the nation boosts up and the public becomes joyful.
Submitted by bkarn5422 on

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