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Band 5

In their advertising, business is nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is it? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#business #emphasise #products #development
In
Correct your spelling
today's
today
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
show examples
 generation, there
are
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is
show examples
variety
Add an article
a variety
show examples
 of
advertising
Replace the word
advertisements
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 surrounding our life. Some corporations tend to put more
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an emphasis on which
thsy
Correct your spelling
they
 are the pioneer of
Correct pronoun usage
their product
show examples
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
. Some people
such
 as status have a positive
impacts
Correct the article-noun agreement
impact
show examples
, whereas others argue that there are more negative effects
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
company
Correct article usage
a company
show examples
. In
this
 essay, I will briefly discuss both
consequence
Change to a plural noun
consequences
show examples
 and give my own opinion.
First
 of all,
new
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a new
show examples
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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 absolutely
attract
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attracts
show examples
consumers
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consumers'
consumer's
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attention simply.
For example
, if customers shop
in
Add a hyphen
in-store
show examples
store
Correct article usage
a store
show examples
, they will be attracted by the big label which
stick
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sticks
show examples
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
big slogan of
new
Add an article
the new
a new
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 arrival.
Moreover
,
this
 can increase the revenue for
company
Add an article
the company
show examples
.
Secondly
, to emphasize the new products,
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
 will see the improvement of a
company
.
In addition
, some categories of products need to innovate new
function
Fix the agreement mistake
functions
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
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 the public.
Thirdly
, due to the competitive market,
publish
Wrong verb form
publishing
show examples
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
new items not only attract
customers
Change noun form
customers'
customer's
show examples
 interest but
also
 let others can not mimic them.
On the other hand
, too many
advertisement
Change to a plural noun
advertisements
show examples
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
 new items
also
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
 some negative influences.
First
, continuing
spread
Fix the infinitive
to spread
show examples
 their fame
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
 physical or digital format to the public, people may feel annoyed. When the time
pass
Change the verb form
passes
show examples
 by,
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
 will ignore
this
 advertisement.
Additionally
Add a comma
,Additionally
show examples
this
 is not a long-term marketing plan for any item.
Second
, some
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
 may not want to be
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
first
 user. They will wait until some influencers post their reviews or recommendations.
Consequently
, the number of sales may decrease. To sum up, it seems that emphasizing new products is significant.
However
, The
company
 should aware of the short-term marketing method and
also
 combine
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
 to progress a wide range of advertising.
Submitted by Veronicapz  on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • novelty
  • excitement
  • latest trends
  • improvements
  • advancements
  • differentiating
  • competitors
  • innovation
  • progress
  • attracting attention
  • generating curiosity
What to do next:
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