IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In marriages today, some argue that it is the responsibility of both spouses to earn a living for the family. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#marriages #argue #responsibility #spouses
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is being opined by some people that it is an obligation on
couples
Use synonyms
 equally to earn money for the family after their marriage. I vehemently espouse that employed married
couples
Use synonyms
 can be conducive for
the
Correct your spelling
them
show examples
 since they can ensure a good social and financial status in society.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in order to ensure
financial
Add an article
the financial
show examples
 stability of the family, it may be the duty of both spouses to earn money. To explain, in the current era, where
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
inflation is being observed by every nation, it can be difficult for one person to put all the responsibility for earning money.
Hence
Linking Words
, if both spouses start to earn for
family
Add an article
the family
show examples
, it may lead them to gain a good economical state in the future.
In addition
Linking Words
, when married
couples
Use synonyms
 work for the family,
this
Linking Words
 can ramp up a better understanding
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 their relationships.
Such
Linking Words
couples
Use synonyms
 feel no hesitation to help each other
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
 domestic chores to reach
office
Correct article usage
the office
show examples
 in time and
this
Linking Words
 thing
decrease
Change the verb form
decreases
show examples
 the chances of conflicts of thoughts in them.
For instance
Linking Words
, A survey conducted by The Guardian newspaper in March 2015 revealed that there was a 35% decrease in the fights and misunderstanding cases had been observed among married working
couples
Use synonyms
. On the other side, some people raise a concern about the care of children of married working
couples
Use synonyms
. Because when parents work for
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 families, they have less time for their children so kids may feel a lot of
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
 mentally and physically.
For example
Linking Words
, children may feel
loneliness
Replace the word
lonely
show examples
 and sometime they may indulge themselves
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 bad company due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of supervision by their working parents.
Hence
Linking Words
, some family time on weekends or having dinner together can be a solution for
this
Linking Words
. To conclude, I completely agree that for
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
strong social and financial conditions, it is certainly
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 responsibility of both spouses to earn for
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
their families.
Submitted by Mrjit147 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: