IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

#people #food #restaurants #home #support
Eating at
food
 stands or
restaurants
 is one of the choices for people.
While
 some people like to eat outside, others love to cook their
meals
 by themselves at their house. In my opinion, I prefer to prepare and eat at home because of some reasons. First of all, cooking
meals
 by myself is quite more economical than going to
food
 parks. Some
restaurants
 add extra costs,
such
 as service charges, to the bill.
Moreover
, there are a lot of expenses that the owners of
restaurants
 have to pay every month,
such
 as the cost of renting, electricity bills and water supply charges.
Therefore
, they have to add these expenses to the price of
food
. That makes the
food
 price per dish
increases
Correct subject-verb agreement
increase
show examples
 more than normal.
On the contrary
, cooking by myself at home, I need to spend money mainly on the ingredients. That makes the cost that I have to pay for the meal cheaper than eating outside.
Next,
due to
 making the dishes by myself, I can cook the
food
 that tastes proper to me. I can add some extra ingredients that I want,
while
chefs
Correct article usage
the chefs
show examples
 of the
restaurants
 do not use them normally.
Moreover
, I can assure you that the
meals
 that I cook are clean. I can control the hygiene of my kitchen and my equipment.
As well as
 the processes of cooking, I can make sure that all ingredients are clean by washing them.
Furthermore
, I can control the quantity of
food
that is
 appropriate for me. In my conclusion, I actually refer to cooking the
meals
 by myself at my house. I think that preparing
food
 and eating it at home can help me to decrease my daily life
expense
Fix the agreement mistake
expenses
show examples
.
Moreover
, I can determine every important factor in making dishes.
Submitted by nitcha543 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Provide a more in-depth discussion of why you prefer to prepare and eat at home, with more specific reasons and examples to support your preference.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is good, but try to link your ideas more cohesively using linking words and transition phrases.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and creatively.
grammatical range
There is a good range of grammatical structures, but some errors in sentence structure and word choice affect the overall fluency of the essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: