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Band 4

Extreme sports that are dangerous like skiing and rock climbing should be banned. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#sports #rock
Practice activities must be in a
day
Replace the word
daily
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 schedule of every single person, it's been part of a
health
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healthy
show examples
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
 with includes many benefits. There are a couple of
sports
 to think about without
put
Wrong verb form
putting
show examples
 your
life
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 risk,
however
Add a comma
,however
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 passion can not be measured. To complete the central
ideal
Correct your spelling
idea
show examples
 about how
sports
 can give a really good
life
 to each person, it is important to talk the
tecnology
Correct your spelling
technology
 bring us
safety
 helmet, gloves, stuff to practice dangerous
sports
, so think about banned them is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 erroneous idea.
First
 point, these
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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 of
sports
 are not
that
Correct word choice
as
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 dangerous as they used to be a long time ago. To
exemplain
Correct your spelling
explain
 it better, you can ask
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 elder guy how
many
Correct quantifier usage
much
show examples
 news he has seen about it in
him
Correct pronoun usage
his
show examples
 younger time and do a question how about nowadays.
In addition
 to
this
, our security has increased a lot, technology
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
 us a lot of benefits which includes
equipaments
Correct your spelling
equipment
 pretty
efficients
Correct your spelling
efficient
 that we can trust. Another point to bring in
this
 discussion is regarding passion, we can not say to
differents
Correct your spelling
different
show examples
 folks what they should or not do about
put
Wrong verb form
putting
show examples
 their
life
 on the edge. What
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 mean is,
every one
Replace the word
everyone
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 knows what they are doing, all the people
knows
Change the verb form
know
show examples
 what
does
Change the verb form
do
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 keep waiting for them at home, we
can not decide jus nothing
Rewrite the sentence
can not decide jus anything
can decide jus nothing
show examples
 regarding it. All in all, nature is made to
discovery
Replace the word
discover
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 new stuff, explore the wild world can bring us
unbelivable
Correct your spelling
unbelievable
 news. A solution that can bring in
this
 theme talks about a
safety
 course, just to guide new
hikings
Correct your spelling
hiking
 and
clibings
Correct your spelling
climbing
clippings
 athletes.
Additionaly
Correct your spelling
Additionally
Additional
, some books to aid these
sportians
Correct your spelling
portions
 how to lead with
unecspects
Correct your spelling
respects
 situations that put
heir
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
life
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 risk. One more point to discuss is government provide their
safety
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 mean to talk about skilled
perason
Correct your spelling
person
 in nature field map creepy places and
fobbiden
Correct your spelling
forbidden
 them, the
safety
 ones can be allowed to climb for
exemple
Correct your spelling
example
. In conclusion, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
mane
Correct your spelling
many
show examples
 of
peole
Correct your spelling
people
 that unfortunately think
abou
Correct your spelling
about
 get
theses
Correct your spelling
these
show examples
sports
 out of the way, but it is not the better idea, there
some
Add a missing verb
are some
show examples
 other
differents
Correct your spelling
different
show examples
 attitudes that can make it affordable, sport in general talk about passion, emotions,
unmeasur
Correct your spelling
unmeasured
measure
stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
show examples
 to bring in.
Submitted by jhonnysouzadasilva on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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