People are surrounded by advertising, which has an increasing effect on our lives. Do you think the positive effects of this outweigh the negative effects.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
contemporary era, advertisement, whether it is goods or services, is growing by leaps and bounds. The public could see
this
Linking Words
everywhere, which highly affects the way to live. From my perspective, The merits of
this
Linking Words
situation surpass the demerits and my inclination is discussed in the
further
Linking Words
essay.
To begin
Linking Words
with, some industries use
this
Linking Words
approach as a trick to attract people to purchase things and for that use
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
of ideas.
For instance
Linking Words
, collaboration with famous actors and actresses, exclusive deals, sales and many more things. Individuals sometimes buy things, which are not needed, because of the temptation of special offers
besides
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
some of them see celebrities as their role
model
Fix the agreement mistake
models
show examples
and seeing them
advertising
Wrong verb form
advertise
show examples
a particular product
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
them want to have it without noticing the fact that
does
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the product worth their money or not.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, advantages of the advertising cannot be avoided and the first reason is that
this
Linking Words
awareness of social issues
such
Linking Words
as health care, childhood obesity, gender inequality and many more problems could be spread to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
folks.
For example
Linking Words
, well-known people do advertise about
this
Linking Words
, who are famous and respected in society,
because
Correct word choice
and because
show examples
of
this
Linking Words
people listen to them and
took
Wrong verb form
take
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
step
Fix the agreement mistake
steps
show examples
to solve
this
Linking Words
difficulty.
Moreover
Linking Words
, everyone could easily know about the latest products no matter where they live. A number of villagers may be unaware of certain goods because it is maybe not available near their accommodation.
However
Linking Words
, they could acknowledge
this
Linking Words
due to
Linking Words
ads.
To conclude
Linking Words
, even though there are a plethora of drawbacks to
this
Linking Words
, the positive effects outweigh the negative effects, which do not only help to solve social issues but are
also
Linking Words
a leisure way to get familiar with new products.
Submitted by Shivuhirpara08 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic. Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction that outlines your position on whether the positive effects of advertising outweigh the negative effects.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay demonstrates good coherence and cohesion, with logical progression of ideas. However, consider using more linking words and phrases to establish clearer relationships between sentences and paragraphs.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumer behavior
  • purchasing decisions
  • impulsive buying
  • materialism
  • economic growth
  • competition and innovation
  • personal finances
  • information dissemination
  • misleading information
  • cultural norms
  • societal values
  • diversity
  • social causes
  • stereotypes
  • unrealistic standards
  • psychological effects
  • mental fatigue
  • stress
What to do next:
Look at other essays: