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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people prefer to spend money and not save it. What are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #money #development
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In the contemporary epoch, there is irrefutable debate among folk about blowing the cash
in contrast
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 to saving it. In
this
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 essay, I am going to examine the stated question and elucidate on numerous motives and
then
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 interpret why I reckon that it is a positive initiative in the modern age that empowers lavish
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
 in the forthcoming paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, the first notion, there are bountiful
rationals
Correct your spelling
rationales
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 for spending funds. The most preponderant is that evidently, money can buy
each
Correct determiner usage
apply
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and
Correct word choice
apply
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everything happiness and the current age is the age of wealth competition.
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for
Capitalize word
For
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 instance, prominent people across the globe are getting wealthy by spending or investing in ventures and stocks they earn a vast portion of their profit on it.
In addition
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 to
this
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, there are numerous other upsides in a plethora of domains and societies. Appreciation to the wide range of advantages it offers, not only does one benefit more when it comes to being effective, but they can enhance productivity and quality of their lives, with much ease, efficacy, and convenience. Needless to say, all these merits stand out in good stead, as far as augmenting the chances of prosperity and excellence is concerned.
On the other hand
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, another pivotal factor in the aforementioned proposition is that it is only likely to help one thrive and excel in varied areas.
Besides
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, when only one follows
such
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 a system, can they broaden their horizons,
hence
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 learning these attributes as dedication and perseverance.
As a result
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, it is apparent why myriad petitions that in a positive direction. to cite an example,
According to
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 a global report a person who wasted money on unessential items is getting richer than a sparing person, In
the
Correct article usage
a
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 nutshell,
according to
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 the
forenamed
Correct word choice
aforementioned
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 quarrels, I would like to restate my perspective that the fruitful vantages of consumed capital are indeed too terrific to neglect the worries of future life in the technological era. Hereby it is a positive tendency
Submitted by Shabanraza489 on

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task response
Address the prompt directly and provide a balanced view on spending money vs saving it.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear structure and the introduction and conclusion could be improved for better coherence.
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