IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

The internet has vastly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing?

#internet #access #information
In the modern world, everyone surely has accepted that
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 is part of our life. Accessing
to
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apply
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information
 via
internet
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the internet
show examples
 has some cons and
prons
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pros
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. What I believe is
use
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the use
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 of
internet
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the internet
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 has to have some restrictions. In another saying, I think that
this
 is entirely not a good thing that accessing the
information
 via
internet
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the internet
show examples
.
First
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The first
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 thing
what
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that
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 I mention would be the security and
reiability
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reliability
 when I hear
internet
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the internet
show examples
. There is a massive hole of regulations and restrictions. It is just because of
lack
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the lack
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 of laws. Technology has developed rapidly in
last
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the last
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 decade and during
this
 rapid change, we were not able to see future circumstances to get prepared to well enough regulations. Nowadays, not having enough
on
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apply
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restrictions causes lots of trouble,
esspecially
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especially
on
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for
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 our little ones.
Childeren
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Children
 are not well aware of how to use
internet
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the internet
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.
Accidentaly
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Accidentally
 pressing
a
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the
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 wrong button might be dangerous for their own security and
well being
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well-being
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,
esspecially
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especially
mentaly
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mentally
.
Second
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The second
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 thing
what
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that
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come
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comes
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 to my mind would be
source
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a source
the source
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 of
information
 might be not well enough to get. There is no
justufication
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justification
 on
internet
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the internet
show examples
 to tell us whether the sources are reliable or not.
According
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toAccording
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 having correct
information
, we should be
carefull
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careful
whereas
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when
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 surfing on
internet
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the internet
show examples
. There is
also
 one more thing
what
Correct word choice
that
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 I certainly have the desire to mention,
that is
durinng
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during
 our research on the
internet
, we may
being
Change the form of the verb
be
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 asked our personal
information
. There are lots of
scam
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scams
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 on
internet
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the internet
show examples
, as well as
other
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in other
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 fields. Sharing personal
information
 might cause serious
demage
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damage
 to us. In
conclution
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conclusion
, reaching
information
 rapidly might
seems
Change the verb form
seem
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 to us,
usefull
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useful
.
However
, when we take our
concideration
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consideration
justfication
Correct your spelling
justification
 , reliability and security,
sound
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the sound
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 of using
internet
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the internet
show examples
 would change in a bad way. We should know that
accesing
Correct your spelling
accessing
information
 on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 is not to
best
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the best
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 way.
Submitted by onayozge00 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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