IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experiences.

#week #workers #weekend #answers #experiences
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The issue of long working weeks has been a subject of debate in recent times. The citizens of almost many countries appeal to the government for shorter working weeks and longer weekends. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement that the workdays should be reduced to less number of days and that people should get longer
day
Fix the agreement mistake
days
show examples
 off. The shorter working
week
Use synonyms
 can increase productivity, reduce
stress
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, and give
time
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 to pursue personal interests. Let us discuss it in detail in the coming paragraphs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, let us shed light on the benefits of having a shorter working
week
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. First and foremost, it can increase productivity. To elaborate, employees may feel more refreshed and motivated after a long
week
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 of rest, ultimately improving
work
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 quality and efficiency. To exemplify, a research conducted by Macquarie University in May 2018, in Australia on 50 people between the age of 30 to 50 years different professionals ranging from doctors, teachers, and engineers revealed that 85 per cent of them felt highly productive and refreshed
due to
Linking Words
 working only 3 to 4 days a
week
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.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, long weekends give extra free
time
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 to individuals to pursue other things to tackle
Correct article usage
the
show examples
stress
Use synonyms
 and depression caused by the high demands of
work
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. To clarify,
due to
Linking Words
 the additional
time
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 they can
work
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 on their personal interests, spend
time
Use synonyms
 with family, and achieve a better
work
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-life balance.
Additionally
Linking Words
, companies could attract more talent, especially younger generations who prioritize flexibility and lifestyle over financial incentives and prefer their life to be less stressful by doing the things they love to do the most.
For example
Linking Words
, many health professionals suggest developing a hobby or spending quality
time
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 with loved ones to reduce
work
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stress
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. To encapsulate, it can be concluded that working for less number of days can enhance the individual's effectiveness of
work
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 and people can
also
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 spend
time
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 with family which is
also
Linking Words
 a
stress
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 buster for many and I agree with the fact that longer weekends give
overall
Linking Words
 job satisfaction and mental health.
Submitted by taliyarifat on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea with supporting details. While ideas are well-organized, transitions between some sections could be smoother.
task achievement
Include more varied examples to illustrate points further, particularly examples from different contexts or cultures.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a strong introduction and conclusion, effectively encapsulating the main idea.
task achievement
Ideas are clearly presented and supported with relevant research, like the Macquarie University study.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured, with clear arguments introduced and developed logically.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Work-life balance
  • Productivity
  • Efficiency
  • Job satisfaction
  • Mental health
  • Environmental benefits
  • Carbon footprint
  • Energy costs
  • Talent attraction
  • Flexibility
  • Continuous operation
  • Staffing costs
  • Workload demands
  • Stress
  • Pressure
What to do next:
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