IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In the future, more people will choose to go on a holiday in their own country and not travel abroad on a holiday. Do you agree or disgaree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words

#future #people #holiday #country #travel #disgaree
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Going on a
holiday
Use synonyms
 with family and friends is
one
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 of the most cherished recreational activities across the globe. Some
people
Use synonyms
 prefer spending holidays in their own
country
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, while many prefer travelling abroad. Certain circumstances have
lead
Replace the word
led
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to believe that, in future
people
Use synonyms
 will prefer
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 in their own
country
Use synonyms
 during holidays.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss why
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
 of them still
travelling
Wrong verb form
travel
show examples
 abroad during
vacation
Use synonyms
.
To begin
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 with,
people
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 in the employment sector get
limited
Change the article
a limited
the limited
show examples
 number of days off for
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vacation
Correct article usage
a vacation
show examples
 period.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
show examples
 of the working population works in a different
country
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 which is not their home, due to globalization.
Therefore
Linking Words
, whenever a
vacation
Use synonyms
 period arrives,
people
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 tend to
travel
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 abroad to visit their families or vice-a-versa. Another reason behind
people
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 travelling abroad is the decline in
prices
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 of air
travel
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.
One
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 study
done
Add the auxiliary verb
was done
show examples
 by the 'University of
Washington'
Change noun form
Washington
show examples
 showcases that, since the boom in
aviation
Add an article
the aviation
show examples
 industry in the early 2000s, more
airline
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 companies have opened up. Which indeed has sprung up greater competition in terms of
prices
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, eventually leading to cheaper air tickets.
One
Use synonyms
 common example of
this
Linking Words
 can be observed in Malaysia. Malaysia has the highest number of international
airline
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 companies, which has
lead
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
 to cheaper international
travel
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 for the public of Malaysia, eventually making Malaysians the most abroad travelling population. For these reasons, most
people
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 will choose to go abroad for their
vacation
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.
Conversely
Linking Words
, the idea of travelling in
one
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's own
country
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 can be appealing to many. It can be associated with knowing our own
country
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 in a better way,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
exploring its history, and contributing to its own economy.
However
Linking Words
,
recent
Add an article
a recent
the recent
show examples
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
show examples
 in finances
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 made travelling in
one
Use synonyms
's own
country
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 equivalent to travelling abroad. The
price
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 of spending a
holiday
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 abroad is very much comparable to the
price
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 of travelling
local
Change the adjective
locally
show examples
. High domestic
airline
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 and entertainment taxation can be attributed to
this
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. Many
also
Linking Words
 account
inflation
Change preposition
for inflation
show examples
 as a major reason behind the equivalent
prices
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. An example of
this
Linking Words
 can be observed in Spain, where the cost of spending a
holiday
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 in London is very much comparable to spending a
holiday
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 in Madrid. High taxation by the government of Spain has led to
such
Linking Words
price
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 equivalencies. For these obvious reasons, a family or group of friends will certainly prefer to
travel
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 abroad at the
price
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 of
a local
Remove the article
local travel
a local journey
a local trip
show examples
travel
Use synonyms
. To summarize, spending a
holiday
Use synonyms
 abroad in
one
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's own
country
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 both really great options. Both are equally enjoyable experiences for families and friends. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 local
travel
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 connects
one
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 to its own roots, recent changes in the
airline
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 industry and government policies have made both types of
travel
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 equally comparable in terms of
prices
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.
Therefore
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, in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 many would prefer to
travel
Use synonyms
 abroad for holidays.
Submitted by mohitarora1912 on

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Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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