IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You recently travelled by train on a long journey and you experienced various problems. Write a letter to the train company’s head office. In your letter, – give the details of your journey, including the date, time and where you sat – explain the problems that happened and express your dissatisfaction – ask about what action will be taken to improve the service

#train #journey #company’s #head #office #date #time #dissatisfaction #action #service
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Respected Sir, I am writing
this
 letter to inform you about the problems that I had during my recent journey. My name is
yyz
Change the capitalization
Yyz
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 Patel and I travelled by train on 26th September 2024, Sunday, in Jaipur Express. My seat number was D26,at 6.30PM As it was a sleeper coach, I was expecting a clean coach, but there was a lot of dust and food particles in the corners,
thus
 it smelled bad.
Furthermore
, the food they served as dinner was not good. it was
full
Add an article
a full
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 dish which included a
desset
Correct your spelling
dessert
 and salad but it was missing
on
Change preposition
from
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 my plate. I suggest you hire some good staff and give them training in hospitality so everyone gets comfortable during their train journey.
Apart from
this
 request to provide
a cleaning equipments
Correct the article-noun agreement
cleaning equipment
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so they can do
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 cleaning task
proparly
Correct your spelling
properly
. I hope you understand the situation and take action
accordingly
. With regards, Yyz Patel
Submitted by Surbhi on

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suitable writing tone
Try to maintain a consistent tone by addressing the company more formally and varying sentence structures to enhance clarity and professionalism.
single idea per paragraph
Ensure each paragraph presents a single idea to maintain clarity and coherence.
complete response
Provide more specific suggestions on what actions should be taken to improve the service.
suitable writing tone
The letter maintains a polite and respectful tone throughout, which is appropriate for a formal complaint.
complete response
The letter includes the specific details of the journey, making it easy for the train company to understand the context of the issues.
greeting and closing
The greeting and closing are appropriately used, creating a formal tone suited to the context.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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