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Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in rich countries. What causes obesity and how can it be solved

#obesity #countries
Nowadays,
obesity
 has become a serious and extensively existed problem in numerous countries, especially in some developed nations,
such
 as America or
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
of
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apply
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Kingdom. In
this
 essay, the causes of
obesity
 and
approuches
Correct your spelling
approaches
 used to handle
with
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apply
show examples
this
 problem would be discussed. In most
of
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apply
show examples
rich
Add an article
the rich
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 countries,
excess
Correct article usage
an excess
show examples
 supply of attractive food might be one of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
of
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for
show examples
obesity
. During the modern period, det to sufficient resources of raw materials of diel in these economies,
large
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a large
the large
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 amount of their citizens can consume delicious food, which might contain
energy
that is
 more than what their
body
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bodies
show examples
 required.
In addition
,
information
Correct article usage
the information
show examples
 gap might be another reason, the producers and sellers may not willing to tell the ordinary how much
energy
 they should consume, and even though some experts publish it, there still are tons of people ignoring the hazard of consuming superfluous desserts or meat but enjoying them.
Nevertheless
,
obese
Add an article
an obese
the obese
show examples
 problem caused by the reasons mentioned above could be handled by several measures.
For instance
, government or other responsible organisations can popularise the acceptable intake of
energy
 and harm of
obesity
,
such
 as
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
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 probability of getting heart diseases, trying to encourage people to avoid
obesity
 voluntarily.
Furthermore
, propaganda
of
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about
show examples
 fitness
also
 could be one of the measures, because moderate fitness can help
human
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humans
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to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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consume excess
energy
 and avoid fat accumulation, preventing
increasing
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the increasing
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 weight of people. In conclusion, the main causes of
obesity
 might be the excess
energy
 provided by
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
 diet and asymmetric
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
. To address
obese
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the obese
show examples
 issue, appropriate measures could be the popularisation of
obese
Replace the word
obesity
show examples
 damage, recommendation of
energy
 intake, and the promotion of fitness, they could effectively slow down the spread of
obesity
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a certain
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
.
Submitted by aiwen117 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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