Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work.

Nowadays, people debate about the phenomenon that students sacrifice their gap
time
working soon to become more disciplined, while others believe
that is
not beneficial at all. In my view, I totally disagree with the matter because they should focus on their educational life. On the one hand, working-
teenagers
would bring some important advantages, and financial independence is one of them. Those who started to involved in some jobs would be able to treat themselves by spending money on their basic needs
such
as clothes, technology devices or books.
Moreover
,
teenagers
can take advantage of working experience, which is helpful for adult life.
For example
, understanding the value of money can be acknowledged through working lessons that teach them to know how to use the money appropriately.
On the other hand
, getting a job too soon causes some certain drawbacks that we should consider carefully. It is obvious that the gap year after school is always an excellent
time
since they can engage in outdoor activities and hobbies;
therefore
, they might miss extracurricular activities
such
as sports due to involving in working.
Moreover
, most part-
time
working students receive a small wage package, but feel stressed out and exhausted under a heavy workload. In exchange, they must decrease their
time
for academic lessons without engaging in entertainment, while they lose the most beautiful young
time
to explore social experiences.
Therefore
, working too soon might not be a good choice for
teenagers
. In conclusion,
although
working
teenagers
can help acknowledge financial lessons, I believe that young students do not need to sacrifice their
time
for jobs since that decision mitigates their educational improvement.
Submitted by marcofirst0812 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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