IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spend on improving existing public transport. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#countries #people #sums #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #transport
In some countries, the people think that a large amount of the money should be spent on building new railway
lines
 which are for very fast
trains
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the cities,
however
, the others say that it is better to spend that money on improving the quality of the
lines
 which are existed. I am going to discuss these both views and in the end, I will give my own opinion.
To begin
 with, railway
lines
 are the most important ways which are used for transporting passengers, importing and exporting the stuff to the whole world. Due to
this
 transporting, it is very important that the authorities should regard the quality of the
lines
. Because neglecting
this
 point may lead to an awful disaster
such
 as derailment of the
trains
.
Hence
, it has primary to enhance the quality of
lines
 before constructing new ones.
On the other hand
, constructing new
lines
 which belong to very fast
trains
, facilitates the transporting and
also
 saves the time.
For example
, by using these new
lines
, we can transport a large number of passengers or goods between the cities or countries in a very short time than the
lines
 which belong to the
trains
 which are very slow. After all, having these very fast train
lines
 are a kind of facility that the citizens of that country can use them. But in my opinion, due to the perils that could happen on the old train
lines
 which are not compensable, it is more important to consider these
lines
 and making better.
Submitted by m.akbari1876 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: