Courses in music and art should be compulsory for student in high school. Do you agree or disagree with the idea.

#courses #music #art #student #school #idea

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Over the

last

Linking Words

decade,

arts

Use synonyms

are becoming more popular in the world. The importance of art and music

to be

Change the verb form

being

show examples

mandatory in high school

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

was always debatable but now it is more controversial. I believe that

brain

Correct article usage

the brain

show examples

would be more stimulated with extracurricular activities

such

Linking Words

arts

Use synonyms

crafts

Use synonyms

, and dance and why

Add a missing verb

am I

show examples

accepting

Wrong verb form

show examples

this

Linking Words

notion and explained

Change preposition

apply

show examples

further

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. In fact,

arts

Use synonyms

and music are not only giving entertainment but

also

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play a significant role in humans. Because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

brain

Add an article

the brain

show examples

is being activated with extracurricular activities and improves the creativity in the students.

Moreover

Linking Words

, these days

crafts

Use synonyms

and composing are becoming a profession

as a result

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those are led to

discovery

Add an article

the discovery

show examples

, innovation, and research. One clear example is that, if a person is having an interest in

arts

Use synonyms

then

Linking Words

he could be more energetic and they can acquire anything in that area. Some public

argue

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argues

show examples

that if a student

having

Wrong verb form

has

show examples

an extra activities

Correct the article-noun agreement

extra activities

an extra activity

show examples

then

Linking Words

they can

be easily attract

Change the verb form

be easily attracted

show examples

to distractions and might not be good at education. Actually,

education

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education's

show examples

final goal is to generate more income.

Nevertheless

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, studies

are not only give

Change the verb form

are not only given

are not only giving

show examples

money but hobbies are

also

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becoming to generate money.

For instance

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, photography is

also

Linking Words

Change the article

show examples

art and now it is a profession

and

Correct word choice

that

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earning a huge amount of

proft

Correct your spelling

profit

. Government should encourage to learn

crafts

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

early age. In conclusion,

arts

Use synonyms

and music are gifted actions, everybody can not achieve them.

However

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, in my point of view schooling system must encourage to go through in

crafts

Use synonyms

then

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students are being improved in that and it is led to improvement in academics

also

Linking Words

Submitted by venkysai670 on Wed Jun 15 2022

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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Courses in music and art should be compulsory for student in high school. Do you agree or disagree with the idea.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Other believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult such as Sahara desert or antarctica . What are the benefits and disadvantages of people visiting there .

in some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?

You recently stayed at a hotel for a conference with your company and there were several problems with your room. Write to the hotel management to complain. Include ﻿﻿Where you stayed ﻿﻿What the problems were ﻿﻿How they can fix your complaints

An increasing number of professionals such as doctor and teacher are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problem does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

You recently stayed at a hotel for a conference with your company and there were several problems with your room. Write to the hotel management to complain. Include Where you stayed What the problems were How they can fix your complaints