Success is often measure by wealth and material belonging. Do you think wealth is best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

Traditionally, some communities across the globe measure success using many factors

such

as wealth, health, and popularity. In my perspective, financial status is not a suitable parameter to gauge success. A successful

person

is someone who achieves work-life balance and contributes to a social cause. To commence with, these days in search of wealth some people act like robots. To enlighten, some employees spend extended hours in the office and no

time

for family and friends due to which they may earn extra income but

losing

Wrong verb form

lose

show examples

their quality

time

to live life.

For instance

, As per a recent survey conducted by the Employment Welfare reveals that more than 75% of workers extend their working hours. Since they spend most of their

time

in the workplace their older parents move to orphan homes as they need support with their daily routines with respect to medication, food and clothing.

Thus

Change the preposition

show examples

the end, these people may have financial assets but lose relationships.

In addition

to work-life balance,

Correct your spelling

successful

Correct article usage

a successfull

show examples

successfull

Correct your spelling

successful

person

supports and

encourage

Correct subject-verb agreement

encourages

show examples

social services. To explain

further

, one cannot deny that donation to social services either in the form of money or

time

Change the article

the

show examples

best service that human beings can do to their communities.

For instance

Although

Mr.

Change the punctuation

show examples

Ambani is

Change the article

the

show examples

richest business

person

in India, he has got no followers; his counterpart,

Mr.

Change the punctuation

show examples

Ratan Tata got a lot of followers as he donates 50% of his income to society and

that is

one of the reasons people call him

successful

Add an article

a successful

show examples

person

Therefore

, supporting social

cause

Fix the agreement mistake

causes

show examples

rather

being

Correct word choice

than being

show examples

selfish is

also

Change the article

apply

show examples

one of the qualities.

Finally

, to recapitulate, Measuring success is a subjective topic each

Correct your spelling

individual

indiviual

Correct your spelling

individual

might have different criteria;

however

, in my perspective, it is

evaulated

Correct your spelling

evaluated

based on

achievement

Correct article usage

the achievement

show examples

of balanced life and behaviour towards supporting society.

Submitted by rana on Thu Jun 16 2022

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Success is often measure by wealth and material belonging. Do you think wealth is best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play video games. What are the positive and negative impacts of playing video games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

Several individuals expand most of their life alive near where they were born. What might be the cause of th is? What are the advantages and downsides?

The Impact of Technology on Education and Learning

Some people think that everyone has the right to have access to university education, and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Art classes, such as drawing and painting, are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. To what extent do you agree or disagree.