IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

. Some companies sponsor sport as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#companies #sponsor #sport #people
In the salad days of the millennium, society is polarized into two groups almost equally regarding the notion that some firms should sponsor games to promote themselves. Different people have distinct mindsets. The following paragraphs would shed light on both approaches before making a final note. To commence with the
first
 notion, there are myriad things to be shared in its
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
.
First
 and foremost,
sports
 play a vital role in human life. Without sponsorships, it is extremely hard to establish
sports
events
 for organizations. Since
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they do not have enough money to organize all amenities for sportsmen.
Thus
, companies pay for
sports
 equipment, dresses, and travel expenses while sponsorships.
Secondly
, the companies build their product awareness among society through advertisements at sporting
events
.
As a result
, they earn huge amounts of profit from it.
In addition
, while sponsoring athletes’ firms build a strong bond with other nations. With It helps to boost the economy of the country. Shifting towards the
second
 school of thought some big sponsors invest more of their money on
events
 that they can manipulate the results to their suiting.
Moreover
, People do blindly trust athletes since they are fans of them
hence
, they waste their money buying unhealthy products
such
 as drinks, cigarettes and so on. Which are harmful to their health. Having discussed the arguments and counterarguments, I would like to infer that firms should sponsor
sports
events
 which will be aidful for them. To justify my state of mind, there is an instance of Coca-Cola sponsoring the hockey club there has been a significant increase of around 85% in the consumption of that energy drink. Hammering the
last
 nail, I personally feel that
sports
events
 should be sponsored by companies since games motivate to children do participates in
sports
 as well as athletes can do their training without any financial hardship.
Submitted by sraparamjeet on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: