IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think that goverment is wasting money on arts and thag money could better spent else where to what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is undeniable that governments which spend
money
Use synonyms
 on
arts
Use synonyms
 and
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 activities are criticized by their people,
However
Linking Words
, I do agree that the government should
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 a priority on spending tax-payer's
money
Use synonyms
, I completely disagree with
stop
Replace the word
stopping
show examples
 funding
arts
Use synonyms
 On the one hand,
those public
Change the determiner
that public
show examples
 who argue that the authorities should not financially support cinema or local T.V series , and they should go to enhance the education, health, welfare and military. those opponents have many
evidences
Change the wording
pieces of evidence
shreds of evidence
show examples
 to argue with.
Firstly
Linking Words
, each government has limited resources
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to its costs,
secondly
Linking Words
, the public
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 the right to ask the government when and where and which the appropriate plan to work with.
Finally
Linking Words
, they consider that celebrities gain huge
money
Use synonyms
 for nothing and they should act or perform these works for a little amount of
money
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, supporting local culture and heritage is reflecting the face of society and
introduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
introduces
show examples
 the country as a tourism destination for others,
therefore
Linking Words
, increasing the
nation
Change noun form
nation's
show examples
 income which is the most important target for any successful
leaders
Fix the agreement mistake
leader
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. Thug,
many
Add a missing verb
are many
show examples
 job opportunities for graduates especially those who are studying and interested in
arts
Use synonyms
. If we take the tourism as
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 industry we should not consider
this
Linking Words
 improvement absorb, whilst they argue
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which the perfect policy to adopt, they can see many successful vivid stories
To
Add the comma(s)
,To
show examples
 sum up,
arts
Use synonyms
 and other
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 activities are not wasting
money
Use synonyms
 or time, it could be an important income resource.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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